What The Hell Is Happening To The Jacksons?

Another day, another ’90s pop star to talk about. Yesterday, it was Minka Kelly taking over for Monica on Brandy’s “The Boy Is Mine” in her alleged sex tape and Mariah Carey signing up to judge season 73,497 of American Idol. Today, it’s Janet Jackson — that’s Miss Jackson, yadda yadda yadda (’90s!) — getting into an altercation with her family over the whereabouts of her 82-year-old grandmother. Jacksons be crazy.

This story has LAYERS, people. First, mother of 10 Katherine Jackson, including Michael and Janet (and don’t forget Tito!), was reported as missing by her nephew, Trent, the Jackson most likely to star in a porno. Until she wasn’t — she was actually just in Arizona, playing Uno and eating dinner. CASE CLOSED.

Except not really. Katherine has been looking after Michael’s children, Prince, Paris, and Blanket, in California since he passed away in 2009, but — and here’s where things get confusing — 14-year-old Paris sent off a series of tweets on Sunday asking where her grandmother was. She wrote, “Yes, my grandmother is missing. i haven’t spoken with her in a week i want her home now.” Yikes. Supposedly Paris was being kept away from Katharine, and after hearing about what she did on Twitter, Jermaine, Randy, and Janet went to their mother’s house. Which led to this, via Radar Online:

Yesterday afternoon certain Jackson family members ambushed Katherine Jackson’s home after their vehicle tore through security gates on the tails of the SUV containing Michael Jackson’s children. After exiting their vehicles, Jackson family members ran up to Michael’s children as they yelled and began to aggressively grab at the cell phones in their hands. Out of concern for the wellbeing [sic] of Prince, Paris, and Blanket Jackson, the children were forced to temporarily leave their home and taken to a safe location. An altercation ensued shortly thereafter and law enforcement arrived at the scene.

Following the incident, it was learned that one of the family members who was part of the ambush admitted that a plan has been in place for the last three years to remove Katherine Jackson from her home and her beloved grandchildren. Prince, Paris, and Blanket Jackson have not heard from their grandmother since she left their home nine days ago to attend a series of her sons’ concerts on their Unity Tour. She never made the shows. Despite efforts to interview Katherine Jackson at her current location in Arizona yesterday, Los Angeles County Sheriffs confirmed that they were denied access to Mrs. Jackson by security for one of her children. (Via)

TMZ has the video of the altercation, and now “Tito Jackson’s son, 34-year-old, TJ, is seeking to become the temporary guardian of Michael Jackson’s three children.” And then there’s this:

Janet signed a letter to Michael’s executors last week demanding that they resign. And she agreed with a statement that Michael “despised” John Branca and John McClain. This, despite the fact that McClain actually gave Janet her career in 1984 at A&M Records with her “Control” album. A few years later it was McClain, always a friend of the Jacksons, who tried to put together Michael and Janet with their brothers for an album and a tour. (Via)

Four things: 1) The entire family has gone (more) insane with their sad, feeble attempts at power; 2) I feel so bad for Michael’s kids; 3) Janet Jackson is beyond irrelevant; and 4) Gossip reporting is exhausting. After all that, I need to relax with a nice, tall glass of Parks and Recreation GIFs:

Oh yeah. That hits the spot.

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