President Donald Trump, the leader of the free world, decided to double down on his confusing claim stating that “had Andrew Jackson been a little later you wouldn’t have had the Civil War” with some new alternative facts Monday evening. His latest lesson in alternative history continued when he tweeted: “President Andrew Jackson, who died 16 years before the Civil War started, saw it coming and was angry. Would never have let it happen!”
President Andrew Jackson, who died 16 years before the Civil War started, saw it coming and was angry. Would never have let it happen!
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) May 2, 2017
Whether Trump is aware that he is speaking for a man who has been dead for over 170 years with authority is difficult to comprehend. He did, after all, discuss Frederick Douglass as if he was alive earlier in the year.
Trump’s questions as to why the Civil War even had to happen earlier in the day ignored the fact that Jackson was a slave owner and responsible for suppressing abolitionists who indeed, were trying to make a very good deal in using policy and peaceful means to, you know, not have human beings owned by other human beings against their will.
And so, as it is wont to do, the internet made jokes with the #TrumpTeachesHistory hashtag. We have entered the “if you don’t laugh, you’ll cry” territory. Bigly.
The Underground Railroad was the nation's first successful subway system. Frederick Douglass was it's first conductor.#TrumpTeachesHistory
— Chi One (@ChiOneToo) May 1, 2017
Melania was the model for the Statue Of Liberty. The fake media won't tell you that. #TrumpTeachesHistory
— Tina #StandWithUkraine 🇺🇦 (@trcfwtt) May 2, 2017
John Wilkes Booth would have had better ratings if Lincoln hadn't run into that bullet with his head, believe me. #TrumpTeachesHistory
— Dem Saints (Nunca Trump) (@LDS_Dems) May 2, 2017
North Korea was part of China, Frederick Douglass has done a terrific job, and Nixon failed because of his personality. #TrumpTeachesHistory
— Mike Levin (@MikeLevin) May 2, 2017
https://twitter.com/AndyTalksStuff/status/859213704054931457
"'Muslims' comes from the Greek word 'moose-lambs,' which means 'to kill all moose and lamb infidels, bigly.'"#TrumpTeachesHistory pic.twitter.com/BxwTULrCHR
— Craig Rozniecki (@CraigRozniecki) May 2, 2017
Andrew Jackson and Frederick Douglass arrived on the Mayflower just in time to prevent the Bowling Green Massacre. #TrumpTeachesHistory
— Richard (@MHS10PSU14) May 2, 2017
Rosa Parks refused to give up her seat on @united, very sad #TrumpTeachesHistory @midnight
— Le Champion Stevie SlowJams (@ANGRYref) May 2, 2017
https://twitter.com/shellbell_xo/status/859196033242472449
#TrumpTeachesHistory The Trail of Tears was a great trail. The best trail. Folks cried tears of joy it was so great. Mine wudve been better.
— Night Skin Nerdy Girl (@NightSkinGirl88) May 1, 2017
#TrumpTeachesHistory Leonardo da Vinci, great guy. Invented the helicopter, but I loved him in the great gatsby. pic.twitter.com/NV0fBQFA5i
— Darrell (@delboyrid) May 1, 2017
The Cold War had nothing to do with temperature. More FAKE NEWS. SAD. #TrumpTeachesHistory
— Livin’ Life (@christirnmom) May 1, 2017
#TrumpTeachesHistory I would have gotten the Louisiana Purchase for much. Much less. Those guys didn't even try.
— cinnamon (@ithrah69) May 1, 2017
https://twitter.com/realPaulMichael/status/859186004304961536
"Not many people know this, but Andrew Jackson was part of the Jackson 5."#TrumpTeachesHistory
— Craig Rozniecki (@CraigRozniecki) May 1, 2017
#trumpteacheshistory "Julius Caesar. Great Leader. Great salads. Great orange drinks. Best Joker."
— Ben W Dorwin (@benwdorwin) May 1, 2017
There was no reason for the Rebellion! Darth was a strong leader! Sad. #TrumpTeachesHistory @midnight pic.twitter.com/qkinm8JJ6X
— Ziggy 🇵🇸 (@mrjafri) May 1, 2017
I remember the Alamo. Everyone should remember the Alamo. Great battle, tremendous. We fought so incredibly. Big win. #TrumpTeachesHistory
— Jason Glaser (@Maczimize) May 1, 2017
Civil War was about manners and being civil to each other.
Like using the phrases:
Yes master
No master#TrumpTeachesHistory @midnight— AKADonaldTrump (@AKADonaldTrump) May 1, 2017
https://twitter.com/LaNaranjaMala/status/859167168684056577
Even Conan got in on the alternative hot takes:
Considering Trump has referenced Frederick Douglass as if he were a living being and knows what Andrew Jackson would’ve done had he been alive during the Civil War, we need to deal with the possibility that Trump can communicate with the dead. It’s the only explanation. Occam’s razor, you know?