And Now, Highlights From Paragon League Wrestling’s Obsessive Rule Book

10.10.14 4 years ago 21 Comments
Paragon League Wrestling is a new, upstart independent promotion that’s going to revolutionize wrestling. The plan on doing this through the one thing that’s been missing from pro wrestling for far too long – STATS! I recently purchased PWL’s 34-page rule book, and not only am I going to provide a run down of what makes a Paragon Wrestling League Event different from everything else, I might even apply their weird rules and stats to matches from other promotions. Before I dive into the rulebook, here’s some choice quotes from an interview with PLW’s creator, Mikey Chase.

“I have been working on this for years. Paragon League started really when I was a small boy playing with action figures. I used to scribble down wins and losses in a notebook and have rankings. When that got to be too one dimensional I started to quantify wins and losses by adding values to different kinds.

But a few years ago, my buddy Nick D’Angelo and I developed a Road to Wrestlemania fantasy game that tracked in-ring and out-of-ring stuff…gave those actions a value…and then…it didn’t really do anything for us. It was fun as (heck) to play, and made watching WWE way more tolerable because it caused us to root for Santino Marella and other jobbers. You had to strategically pick who you wanted to have on your “roster” or team…and it ran from Royal Rumble to WrestleMania and every WWE televised event was scored…I was in a car with Nick who did commentary for CTWE…and we just were like “let’s make the fantasy game…a promotion…” which was great considering I had my own ideas for a promotion like this…with a ranking and scoring system since I was 12.

I used to have excel sheets that scored and ranked my CAWs in video games. I mean…this concept really has been with me for most of my life. I’m 27. I’ve been working with statistics and pro wrestling since I learned how to use basic excel at the age of 12. I used to just track wins and losses…but that got boring ‘cause one of my favorite CAWs seemed to always lose in simulated matches. so I was never able to put him in the championship matches based on the rules I wrote for the system. So I started making wins and losses quantifiable by style. You win by submission you get more points than winning by countout and so forth.”

Everyone got all that? Nerd kid is incapable of just smashing action figures together and making explosion noises like a normal person and has to quantify everything. Kid grows up and tracks wins and losses in video games, becomes frustrated that one of his characters is terrible, tries to rewrite the rules for the benefit of said character. Okay, with all of that sad back story in mind, let’s look at the rulebook that will revolutionize the world of professional wrestling.

INTRODUCTION AND DEFINITIONS

1.a. PARAGON LEAGUE WRESTLING is a statistic based professional wrestling organization that takes the drama and excitement of professional wrestling and blends it with the statistical tension of major sports.

Yes, because there’s nothing that can add tension like stats! I know in between each nail-biting pitch of these last few extra-innings baseball playoff games, I’ve rushed to recalculate everyone’s VORP to make things more exciting.

1.e. COMPETITOR RATING or PARAGON RATING refers to the amount of points that a competitor has accumulated over the course of the season.

1.f. MATCH POINTS refer to the points earned within a match.

1.g. COMPETITION POINTS refer to any points earned for competing, but are not earned during the match itself. These are the points given for winning championships and for competing in specific match-types.

Yeah, the basic gist of PLW is that while winning matches is important, so does the manner in which you win, because then you can earn more points, and more points means a higher score. Scores are important in other sports, so to put them in wrestling will mean the wrestling also becomes important!

SEASONS AND EVENTS

2.a. Paragon League Wrestling uses a season format

2.b. The 2014 Paragon League Wrestling Season will run from September 2014-February 2014

I know it’s a simple typo, and I’m sure I’ve made more than my fair share throughout my post history, but I like the idea that PLW runs backwards, Benjamin Button-style. That concept certainly seems like more of a Chikara move. “We have crowned our champion at the start of the year, now to determine how it happened!”

3.a. Events are host to the matches for the season.

3.c. While matches are the primary attraction at the events, other attractions may occur.

3.d. Most events are subject to a brief intermission.

I want to know what other attractions could possibly occur during an independent professional wrestling event. Interviews? Fan interactions? RAFFLES?

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