We know we said Braun Strowman was the greatest wrestler ever when he flipped an ambulance with his bare hands, and again when he flipped a semi truck with his bare hands, and that time he threw a chair at Roman Reigns, and when he tried to kill Kane with the stage, and when he tried to kill Kane with a grappling hook, but hear us out: Braun Strowman played a fake Elias song on a gigantic double bass and then attacked Elias with it. I know it looks like a cello, but he’s enormous. Braun Strowman is the greatest wrestler ever.
Here’s part one, in which Strowman serenades Elias with the most beautiful song you’ve ever heard the evil Santa from Futurama sing. Spoiler alert: the strings don’t last long.
♫ Well Elias says he’s gonna win, but we all know that that ain’t true
You look at me boy when I’m singin’, because I’m not finished with you
You may not know it, you may not realize, but when this song’s over,
You’re gonna get these hands ♫
In part two, Elias runs afoul of These Hands™ and gets an upright bass to the back. Strowman carrying around that six-foot musical instrument like Toshiro Mifune in Seven Samurai is great.
I’m not sure we can say, “Braun Strowman should sing original songs and then attack people with musical instruments every week,” but we’re happy it happened at least once. Join us next week when Strowman finds a pair of rocket boots and punches the moon, who the hell knows?