The Smashing Pumpkins’ Billy Corgan Will Now Be In Charge Of Writing Impact Wrestling

What better way to get regressive, stuck-in-the-past Impact Wrestling out of it’s tired rut? Why, hiring someone whose relevance peaked in the nineties, of course! I’m kidding, I’m kidding. Today is the greatest day I’ve ever known for TNA breaking news to be totally honest.

TNA sent out a press release this morning heralding the hiring of Billy Corgan as their new senior producer:

TNA Entertainment today announced Billy Corgan, founder of the Smashing Pumpkins and creative icon, is joining TNA Wrestling as Senior Producer, Creative and Talent Development, effective immediately. In this position, Corgan will develop characters and create story lines for TNA’s flagship program IMPACT WRESTLING, broadcast Friday nights at 9/8c on Destination America, as well as other TNA programming.

Corgan joins a gifted group of creative writers led by TNA Executive Vice President of Television and Talent John Gaburick. In addition to partnering with his creative colleagues in writing compelling and emotionally engaging story lines for TNA programming, Corgan will attend TNA television tapings where he will serve as a senior producer, working with TNA’s roster of world-class athletes including veterans such as TNA World Champion and Olympic Gold Medalist Kurt Angle, Jeff Hardy and Gail Kim, as well as a fresh crop of Superstars led by Ethan Carter III, Bram, Rockstar Spud and more.

“As an iconic songwriter and performance artist, Billy stands as a true powerhouse,” said Gaburick. “I also find him to be an ardent historian of professional wrestling and a true visionary. We knew Billy would bring a great viewpoint when we offered, and he graciously accepted, to attend a recent creative summit. During those meetings, Billy’s pioneering perspectives and collaborative approach made it quickly evident we needed to bring him on as a permanent member of our team.”

For those of you who aren’t aware, Billy Corgan is a longtime pro wrestling fan, and even started his own Chicago-based promotion – Resistance Pro Wrestling – back in 2011. Corgan was not in charge of creative decisions for the company, which is already a positive aspect of his new role, given that R-Pro was objectively pretty bad. Former TNA performer Jay Bradley was also a staple in Resistance Pro, but I doubt we’ll see the guy whose most famous TV moment was him saying he humped roads come back anytime soon. Corgan also had a wrestling-based reality show with AMC, but the show was cancelled shortly before his departure from R-Pro in 2014.

While his most creative endeavours had nothing to do with wrestling storylines, I’m actually pretty excited to see what kind of direction he can take the company in. That said, literally all I want from this is for him to rename Jeff Hardy’s finisher the ZWANton Bomb. I mean, Mr. Anderson and the Infinite Sadness is already way too real a thing, y’know? I will admit, however, that if Abyss tells Bram that “the killer in me is the killer in you” in just one backstage segment I will pop SO HARD.

Here’s ol’ William talking about his previous experiences in the wrestling world, and what he hopes to accomplish by taking a creative lead at Impact Wrestling. Watch this while having the realization that you totally like way more Smashing Pumpkins songs than you think you do: