Vnimanie! Are you one of those people chanting “We want Lana” at WWE events? Or just screaming it at your TV? Of course you are. All good, honest folks who value hilarious, leggy blondes over boring old U.S.-Russian relations want more Lana. If you don’t like Lana, well, you’re a sad person and about to become sadder.
According to the Wrestling Observer, Vince McMahon and WWE are very high on Lana. New female face of the company kind of high. Sadly, the evil Russian we know and love will have to undergo some changes if she wants to ascend to the top of WWE.
Obviously, she’ll be turning face and ditching Rusev, a process that has already begun, but Vince reportedly feels she should also be revealed to be American. The name Lana will likely be kept, but there’s been talk of using her real name, C.J. Yes, the reason they might use C.J. is because it was Pamela Anderson’s name on Baywatch. The dream of the ’90s is alive in WWE.
While I’m sad that we’ll be losing one of the best WWE characters of the past few years, I am excited to see what Lana can do in a somewhat less restrictive role. It’ll also be interesting to see what they do about the fact that Lana and Rusev are a couple in real life, and Lana’s Instagram is basically a non-stop feed of them being adorable in public. I suppose they could say Lana was an American secret agent who recruited Rusev to our side, but she found her heart had been compromised somewhere along the way. Whatever they have to do to make sure we get more pictures of them at Los Angeles Clippers and Nashville Predators games.
You crazy, evil kids.