Previously on the Best and Worst of WWE NXT: Roderick Strong earned a title shot, TM61 lost their hyphen, and Nikki Cross took out some aggression on NXT’s alt-right avatar.
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And now, the Best and Worst of WWE NXT for February 7, 2018. I’m never gonna know you now, but I’m gonna love you anyhow.
Best: Division Day
We’ll get to the opening of this week’s NXT TV later on in this review — and oh boy, do I have thoughts about it — but let’s start off with a guaranteed Best in Heavy by-god Machinery. Everything this team does is guaranteed to entertain, and it just gets better with every appearance. Re-watch the introduction to this match, and look at Otis Dozovic twitching in the background as Riddick Moss and Tino Sabbatelli are posing for the camera. This is the kind of stuff that so many wrestlers never think about — act as if you’re always on camera, because you never know what the lens might catch.
As for the match itself, it featured a few new tricks in Heavy Machinery’s bag (how about Tucker Knight’s massive rolling senton off the apron?) and gave the team a clean victory over the heels who cheated to win last time. And not to continue to develop my one-man Otis Dozovic fan club, but again, watch his body movements when Knight is pinning Sabbatelli — he punches and kicks the air with each fall of the referee’s hand. It’s a thing of beauty, man.
Post-match, we’re teased with a potential Moss/Sabbatelli breakup, threatening the end of NXT’s first tag team comprised of fashion-forward, big-spending gay lovers. Is this what Stephanie McMahon meant about integrating LGBT characters into WWE programming?
Worst: Stupidity Tries
Damnit, Johnny. You brought the house down at TakeOver: Philadelphia, but you didn’t win. Then you come out here and cut a promo about how the championship doesn’t mean anything compared to the respect of the WWE Universe (which, uh, f*ck that noise, these people can’t even chant “JOHNNY WRESTLING!” in unison).
And for the record, you already had the respect of the WWE Universe! You’ve been NXT’s biggest whitemeat babyface for months. But here you are, 0-3 against Andrade “Cien” Almas, and you’re content with saying, “I’m the real winner here, the championship was inside me all along,” or some such bullsh*t? UGH.
Gargano’s stupidity is compounded when Almas and Zelina Vega come to the ring to gloat about their third straight victory, and after bringing out Candice LeRae for an unofficial mixed match challenge, Gargano decides to put his career on the line for one more title shot, presumably at TakeOver: New Orleans. It’s not abundantly clear if this is a “Loser Leaves NXT” match or a “Career vs. Title” match yet — but if it’s the latter? Johnny: You are so dumb, you are really dumb, for real.
Best: Roman Candle
Another week, another quick, effective and wholeheartedly terrifying appearance from Shayna Bae-szler. If a “Tap, nap or snap” T-shirt isn’t available on WWEShop by the time I finish writing this column, what are we even doing? Ember Moon took Baszler’s bait via Twitter, agreeing to a championship rematch next week. Given how WWE itself hasn’t spoiled the result via social media yet, I have to assume Moon retains again, but I’m still interested to see just how much pain Baszler inflicts on our wooden werewolf warrior.
Worst: Ballad Of Big Nothing
Bianca Belair is always a welcome sight on NXT programming, but unlike her squash match two weeks ago, this one felt like a big ol’ pile of nothing. Belair squared off against a Georgia indie wrestler named Jessix Hill who has literally zero online presence, and got in literally zero offense (unless you count a handshake as physical contact).
To me, this didn’t make Belair look any better than she’s already looked, as her finishing move — a reverse powerbomb, sorta? — looks odd, and immediately puts her out of position to make the cover. (However, watching her do squats with a full-grown woman on her back made me schedule an extra session with my personal trainer.)
I understand why every Belair match can’t include her hair-whip spot — you don’t want to have the novelty wear off — but man, this could’ve used at least another move or something. However, I will award a Best for just how fast Belair can wrap up three feet of hair on top of her head. Now that was impressive.
Worst: Oh Well, Okay
So let’s review: SAnitY loses the tag titles to the Undisputed Era in December. Three weeks later, their scheduled rematch gets canceled after TUE jumps them backstage. The teams ran afoul of each other again at TakeOver: Philadelphia two weeks ago, so last week, it’s announced that Adam Cole will fight Killian Dain, and Bobby Fish and Kyle O’Reilly will defend their tag titles against Eric Young and Alexander Wolfe.
Literally none of that happens tonight.
I know “card subject to change” and all that, but seriously f*ck your bait-and-switch, NXT. SAnitY gets boned hard here, losing out on their contractually-mandated tag title rematch, only to be put into a six-man tornado tag in which the belts are not on the line. Since when is William Regal out to protect the heels?
The main event itself ended up looking a little like the WarGames match from a few months ago, with tables, steel chairs and kendo sticks all making appearances. The match took some weird turns for both the live audience and the TV audience — I like how NXT tends to keep their lighting low as opposed to Raw and Smackdown, but when you have a melee like this match, with folks brawling all over the ring area, it becomes difficult for both audiences to see everything due to huge pockets of darkness. Then, the live crowd loses four of the six competitors to a backstage brawl that was presumably not shown in the arena (but, to their credit, did look cool on TV). Then, the home viewing audience has to suffer through not one but two commercial breaks. Y’know, nothing says “tornado tag” like massively pregnant pauses in the action.
It was at this point that I had a hard time getting reinvested in the match, even though there were some neat spots here and there (I liked O’Reilly’s running double knee off the apron into a sitting Wolf, and Dain chucking Fish off the stage into everybody else was fun). Since the title match had been scrapped in favor of this, it was a safe assumption that SAnitY would come out on top, which means that the Undisputed Era would once again be taking the L.
Cole, Fish and O’Reilly are trying to be the nWo, but have lost more matches in the past three months than Hogan, Hall and Nash probably lost in three years. Yet they still want to be looked at as if they’re some sort of game-changing, system-shocking faction that will rule atop NXT forever. Millennial world order, indeed.
Next Week: Pete Dunne vs. Roderick Strong for the UK Championship, Ember Moon vs. Shayna Baszler for the NXT Women’s Championship, plus Aleister Black.
