FlipBoardYes, the full-court press has now begun for Total Bellas, which debuts TOMORROW NIGHT OH MY GOODNESS. The cast members of Total Bellas are simply everywhere this week, dishing all the dirt and dropping little tidbits about what we can expect from the spinoff to the greatest television show that has ever been broadcast.
On Monday, Nikki and Brie Bella appeared on The Real, which is a talk show I’ve never heard of and is somehow not hosted by the Iron Sheik. (Come on, tell me you wouldn’t tune in every single day at 3 p.m. to watch Iron Sheik interview some jagoff from a CW show or whatever. You’d set your DVR.) While they were there, Nikki dropped the bombshell that John Cena — noted marriage abolitionist — is now open to the idea of getting hitched to Nikki. (She’s the one that wears a hat.)
Obviously, Nikki is thrilled about this development … but now it’s kind of making life awful for her, because she’s expecting the question to be popped at literally any moment.
“The past year, he’s actually talked about that he’s open to marriage so, of course, my hopes go through the roof. So, he’s like let’s go have this romantic dinner. I’m like ‘this is it.’ I feel like every moment I’m waiting for it. It’s been my birthday it’s been an anniversary … the holidays …
“I am going to Napa next week. See, I don’t want to get excited. Like I’m ruining everything because I get, like the perfect outfit. And here are those perfect moments and it’s like, ‘okay that was nice.'”
Brie then said she’s super proud of her sister because Nikki has managed to not go ring shopping yet. Nikki agrees that picking out some huge rock for herself would totally jinx things, but I say just go for it. Live your best life, Nikki Bella.
This is exciting stuff for fans of Total Divas and for fans of true love, and I’m now fantasy booking the second season of Total Bellas to be leading up to John popping the question. Yes, without having seen even one episode of Total Bellas I’m already hoping for a second season. Lay off me; this is all I have.
(h/t Wrestling Inc.)
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There’s something incredibly awkward about running a women’s title match as the Raw main event between two people who are being held up as the vanguard of women who only want to wrestle, while at the same time as putting an increased promotional push into Total Bellas.
All reality TV is awful. But people still watch it.
There’s an increased promotional push behind it because there are a ton of women who are into it. You think Nikki is over just ’cause she kiiinda figured out how to be a hoss diva? :P No, it’s because for a lot of women who watch wrestling, she’s the girl that can do both.
Cena: “Dan, you gotta give me some advice. Nikki’s driving me crazy with all this marriage talk.”
Bryan: “It’s simple, John, just tell her you’re OPEN to the idea of marriage. Knowing there’s a possibility will make her happier and keep her out of your hair.”
Cena: “That sounds like a great idea, Dan! Thanks!”
*TWO WEEKS LATER*
Cena: “Jeez, Dan, now it’s even worse! Now she keeps pestering me for when I’m gonna pop the question!”
Bryan: “Oh… Um, my bad?”
Cena: >:(
(Daniel in his head holds up a sign that reads “Sucker”) ^Daniel Bryan Danielson proving once again he IS the Troll Par Excellence of the Total Divas brand.
Poor Burnsy is going to recap this one too, isn’t he?
Someone needs to so at least we know there is something on worse than most episodes of Raw. (Exception: random Dean Ambrose sightings, and according to the commercial Daniel and Brie’s dog bit Cena, so there’s that.)
Am I the only one that pictures Nikki making a dramatic pause after Cena proposes and Brie jumping from out of frame yelling “C’MON NIKKI!!!”
LOL
+2
Is she sure he didn’t say he was ready for the possibility of an open marriage?
ZING!
I really want to like boobie Bella because by all accounts she is a nice girl, but I just can’t. Badgering your significant other for years and wearing him down to where he’ll consider marrying you is super romantic and not at all desperate. Even if it is all fake for this stupid reality show there is no way I would put that version of me out there.