Nike, Please Stop Making Terrible Hybrids

11.21.13 4 years ago 23 Comments


Words By Retro Boogie

Somehow, Jordan brand is probably to blame. I just know it. A few of us are probably guilty of buying a pair of a terrible Air Force 1/Jordan shoes. Redemption came in the form of the more unique and better executed Spizike models.

But, repenting to the sneaker gods was not enough. For some reason, Nike found it prudent to release these monstrosities, the Air Force 1 Low ‘The Glove,’ and expect us to pay $180 for them.

Look man. After being a first ballot Hall Of Famer, Gary Payton the point god deserves his respect*. And these kicks probably weren’t what he was thinking of when they told him they had Dylan-worthy hot fiyah to release in his name.

Lux versions of Air Forces almost never cease to impress sneaker heads with stitching methods, leather paneled midsoles, and super precise embossing. But this f**kery right here? You can miss me with all that. Essentially you’re paying nearly $100 more for an extra panel of leather, white hosiery adorning the sides and a goddamn zipper. Our intelligence is being insulted and the assumption’s being made that we’ll buy anything with a nickname or cool pack associated with it.

Dear readers, if you happen to stumble across the poor soul who cops these, snap a picture because you’re looking at a future Darwin Award winner.





Previously: Nike Air Zoom Flight “The Glove” White/Poison Green

Pics: eBay via SN

* — At least they did give GP a better shake with the Zoom Flight retro.

Around The Web