A Snake Got Into The Trail Blazers’ Locker Room And Hilarity Ensued

After a spectacular and exciting first round elimination of the Houston Rockets, the Portland Trail Blazers seem to have run out of gas, as they find themselves down 0-2 to the San Antonio Spurs, who are basically like a steamrolling bat out of hell right now. OR ARE THEY??? Perhaps there’s more than meets the eye to the Spurs’ success in this second round series. Before last night’s 114-97 loss in Game 2, the Blazers were greeted by a terrifying guest in the visiting team locker room at the AT&T Center. Thomas Robinson arrived at his locker to discover that he’d be sharing it with a f*cking snake.

Even the biggest, baddest and toughest athletes aren’t immune to how terrifying a snake can be up close. Hell, this thing could have been a harmless garden snake and at least one guy in the locker room might have pissed his drawers in front of his entire team. But the players first believed this was a rattlesnake they were facing, and that could have meant serious trouble. At the very least, it might have even distracted them in the game.

“I was scared,” said Robinson, who added that he’d only seen snakes on Discovery Channel before. “I ain’t gonna lie, I was scared.”

Robinson reacted by screaming and leaping “about five feet high and 20 feet back.”

Reserve guard Will Barton, Robinson’s neighbor in the locker room, claims he kept calm while hopping up on his chair. There was all kinds of commotion until “our brave trainers,” as Robinson referred to them, corralled the beast. (Via ESPN)

Fortunately and much more humorously, it turned out to just be a regular, old snake that could have seriously hurt anyone. But to give us an idea of what kind of disgusting reptile they were dealing, the Blazers Tweeted a photo of it, and I screamed and smacked my monitor with a rolled up magazine in sheer horror.

Mo Williams added some insight into the horrifying adventure as well, claiming that the team was “scared as hell.”

These are some cheap tactics, Spurs. But I have to admit that I respect the willingness to do whatever it takes.