06.07.07 11 years ago 26 Comments

Gary D'Amato of the Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel has a feature on 92-year-old Dick Woerfel, who shot a 74 on the links at Grant Park last week.  But before you get impressed, remember that par for the course is only 67.  Hell, at seven over par, the most impressive thing he did that day was stay alive through the morning to play golf.

Tiger Woods and Phil Mickelson won't be shooting 74s when they're 92. You can take it to the bank.

No, you CAN'T take that to the bank.  Scientists will be able to make anything possible in the next sixty years.  By the time Tiger Woods is 92, he'll be at least part robot and be hitting the green with his driver on 500-yard holes.  Or is Tiger Woods already part robot?  I get confused.  He's got a whole bunch of other stuff in him.  He's like black and white and Thai and three other things, right?  Wasn't one of his great-grandfathers a paper mill?

Gah, that picture sucks.  I can smell him from here.  It's like a mixture of formaldehyde and loneliness.

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