Britain Scrabble Champ Is… Unique

Senior Writer
11.12.10 7 Comments

Two weeks ago, nerds from across Great Britain gathered to compete for the national Scrabble championship, a title so monumental that women don’t even bother wearing panties around the champions lest they soak them instantly. But this year’s championship is perhaps the most unique in the event’s history, as the champion is transsexual. Thirty-two year old Mikki Nicholson has been diagnosed as a “woman trapped in a man’s body.” This is unrelated to my current lawsuit involving a “woman trapped in a man’s basement.”

Nicholson won the tournament with the word obeisant, which means respect, and for his/her efforts, he/she won £1,500 and he/she plans to use that money to travel to Malaysia in December for another Scrabble championship. That sounds like a great idea unless I’m completely missing something, Press Association

Mr Nicholson, who is unemployed, was up against four-time champion Mark Nyman, a wordsmith who has spent time in Dictionary Corner on Channel 4’s Countdown.

Mr Nyman, 44, has over 30 years playing experience and has won more than 20 major tournaments including the World Championship.

His victor said: “It was a big challenge but I wouldn’t have entered if I didn’t think I had a chance of winning. I’m thrilled to have won and I can’t wait to celebrate.”

Maybe it’s just the capitalist in me, but I was unemployed for seven months after college and I would have eaten one of my fingers for £1,500 so I would maybe try to save a little cash for a rainy day. But what do I know? I’m just a part-time blogger and full-time aquatic gymnast.

Nicholson has become an unlikely hero for transsexuals over the past two weeks, making headlines throughout the interwebs, despite just being a dude in a wig. Yeah, I should mention that Mikki has never had any surgeries or even hormone treatment, so he/she is really just a he in a dress, but we are not here to nitpick or bully. Hell, I haven’t even used the word tranny. Damn it, now I’m gonna have GLAAD all over my ass. Yikes, poor choice of words.

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