01.31.08 10 years ago 14 Comments

MediaTakeOut is floating some spurious rumor that the girlfriend of one of the Giants players purchased a ticket for the woman who put up the restraining order against Randy Moss for pushing off repeatedly on her face with his fists, meaning he wouldn't be able to play. Except that's not how restraining orders work.

I am [NY Giants player's] girlfriend and I had to tell you about a rumor going around with the players. [Giants player] told me that a big Giants fan bought Superbowl tickets for that woman that Randy Moss beat up and he's paying for all her expenses.

They're saying that if the woman in sitting at the game, Randy Moss won't be able to play because of the restraining order. Slick right. But good for them. The Patriots are a bunch of cheaters so it serves them right.

Also to appear: Debby Belichick, the black child Wes Welker fathered who he doesn't want to talk about and keeps locked in the basement, Bridget Moynahan, the woman Osi Umenyiora shat on, Jean Strahan, Tiki Barber, that girl that shot down Plaxico Burress at the club and Rodney Harrison's sense of decency.

But not Jeremy Shockey, because he's a bitch. -Christmas Ape

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