UPROXX Sports College Football Power Rankings, Week 5: Baylor At No. 1? Why Not?!

Last week, four teams in the top 10 of the Uproxx Sports Power Rankings lost, which means there is all kinds of shakeup after Week 5 and heading into the sixth week of the season. We always have at least one (usually two) weeks like this where the Top 25 basically flips over on its head, a bunch of teams tumble, and still others drop out because they can’t quite hang on.

The exciting part of this, of course, is seeing other teams ranked super highly who wouldn’t normally be there. This makes some folks angry: “Wait, my team is undefeated, why did they drop?” “You don’t know anything you’re not even a real boy you’re just an internet man” “My wife left me” … and other folks just don’t even notice because they’re not reading anyway. Plus, there’s that third category of grumbling college football fans who think we shouldn’t rank teams at all until the season is over, I guess, and then we can just have that giant sassy computer from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory spit out the rankings.

These are my rankings and you can hate me if you want. I don’t hate you. I actually like you, and I want to talk to you about life and love and courage and happiness. Just hit me up whenever.

1. Baylor (4-0)

Last week: 6
Last game: Beat Texas Tech, 63-35
Next up: Saturday at Kansas

Everybody else has no idea who should be ranked number one, either, so I’m going a bit off the beaten path. Baylor hasn’t played a super tough schedule or anything, but it has scored an average of 63.75 points per game and is allowing 26. While that 26 seems like a high number, especially against the Lamars and Rices of the world, some of those are coming in blowouts, and the tempo does factor in. The Bears have been as impressive as anyone, they’re beating the teams they’re supposed to (handily), and they know who they are. I can’t say the same for a lot of other teams in the Top 10.

2. Utah (4-0)

Last week: 10
Last game: Beat Oregon, 62-20
Next up: Saturday vs. California

The Utes couldn’t have asked for a better week to have a bye, as teams all around them faltered and looked downright bad. Plus, Michigan keeps on playing well, which doesn’t exactly mean much seeing as the win over the Wolverines came early, but it does matter for perception’s sake (that’s why Utah had seven first-place votes in the AP Poll, I think). The same applies to the Utes as to Baylor; they’re strong in all phases of the game, and they haven’t been sleepwalking against inferior competition. And I’m bored.

3. Clemson (4-0)

Last week: 9
Last game: Beat Notre Dame, 24-22
Next up: Saturday vs. Georgia Tech

The rain may have played a factor, and the Tigers almost gave it away, but this was as close to a signature win as you can get from Clemson over Notre Dame. The defense is for real, and the offense when the weather is better should continue to improve. The Tigers can’t afford a letdown against Georgia Tech this week, and the schedule doesn’t exactly ease up – vs. Boston College, at Miami, at N.C. State before the home date against Florida State – but right now, the Tigers have earned their spot.

4. TCU (5-0)

Last week: 7
Last game: Beat Texas, 50-7
Next up: Saturday at Kansas State

The Horned Frogs stuck it to Texas in a game that probably says more about the state of the Longhorns than it does TCU, but it is good that Gary Patterson was able to back up his shade.

The Frogs seem to play better when there’s more to play for, so it’s good Big 12 play is really starting in earnest. A trip to the Little Apple is never easy, but on paper, TCU shouldn’t struggle against a Wildcats team that just might be starting you at quarterback this week.

5. Ohio State (4-0)

Last week: 5
Last game: Beat Indiana, 34-27
Next up: Saturday vs. Maryland

If the Buckeyes are going to make it back into the College Football Playoff, they’re going to need to rely on Ezekiel Elliott. He ran wild late last season, and he’s what will make this offense go. It won’t be the merry-go-round of quarterbacks. It won’t be trick plays. It’ll be running the dang ball. (And don’t forget, we the people now own RunTheDangBall.com.) I still believe in the talent of Ohio State, and each week they avoid a grenade in the early season slate might allow things to snap into place, but it’s getting harder and harder to imagine them going undefeated. Would they still be considered with one loss if that were to happen?

6. Michigan State (5-0)

Last week: 1
Last game: Beat Purdue, 24-21
Next up: Saturday at Rutgers

The Spartans keep suffering tough injuries, and they seem to be regressing as the year goes on. There’s still plenty of time to get it right, and as long as they keep winning games (even tough they looked downright poor in the squeaker against Purdue), there are still those Michigan and Ohio State games lingering to make statements.

7. LSU (4-0)

Last week: 12
Last game: Beat Eastern Michigan, 44-22
Next up: Saturday at South Carolina

Leonard Fournette ran for 200 yards again. He’s the first SEC back *ever* to do that. But he claims not to care about stuff like that. Probably because he has bigger goals in mind, like rushing for 200 yards in six-straight games, or winning the Heisman, or curing cancer, or winning an Oscar, or eating 100 hot dogs in 10 minutes.

8. Oklahoma (4-0)

Last week: 13
Last game: Beat West Virginia, 44-24
Next up: Saturday vs. Texas (Red River at the Cotton Bowl)

The Sooners made it look relatively easy against a pretty good West Virginia team in Week 5, and now they have the Red River game to play around with the Longhorns. In recent years, this could be one of those giant Minesweeper trap games that would blow up in Oklahoma’s face, but I just don’t know if Texas has enough in them to pull an upset like this. Plus, Oklahoma looks focused and driven, and as good offensively as the Sooners have been in a long time.

9. Florida  (5-0)

Last week: NR
Last game: Beat Ole Miss, 38-10
Next up: Saturday at Missouri

Okay, Gators. Okay, Jim McElwain. You showed me you mean business with this win. I had a feeling Florida could keep it close against Ole Miss, but I really didn’t see a four-touchdown domination coming. The defense still has a bunch of Will Muschamp’s terrific talent, and the offense is coming along nicely. There might not be anyone to block the Gators in the SEC East, although the Cocktail Party is looking like a big one come Halloween weekend.

10. Ole Miss (4-1)

Last week: 2
Last game: Lost to Florida, 38-10
Next up: Saturday vs. New Mexico State

The Rebels might be hurting, but they get to play New Mexico State on Saturday. It’s like losing your job and immediately winning $50,000 on a scratch-off ticket you bought along with a couple tallboys of Steel Reserve to drown out your pain. There are worse ways to spend a Saturday.

11. Alabama (4-1)

Last week: 11
Last game: Beat Georgia, 38-10
Next up: Saturday vs. Arkansas

This lede, tho:

Go ahead. Wear red jerseys. Or black. Like it matters. For all Alabama cares, you can go ahead and wear pink polka dots.

Put up hype billboards and bark like rabid dogs during warmups and bring back the greatest player in school history for inspiration. Oh, by the way, Nick Chubb’s a nice player, but he’s no Herschel Walker.

Now set the game time after dark or play it in the pouring rain. Same difference. Not even a total eclipse or an actual flood would be enough to save you.

None of that Junkyard Dawg posturing means a thing when the game starts, the gimmicks end and you discover the painful truth once again. When it comes to big-boy football, you’re Georgia, and they’re Alabama, and it’s boys against men.

Way to go, Kevin Scarbinsky. Not only have you captured the Alabama spirit perfectly, but you had fun with it. Golf claps your way.

12. Northwestern (5-0)

Last week: 16
Last game: Beat Minnesota, 27-0
Next up: Saturday at Michigan

Raise your hand if you thought the Northwestern vs. Michigan game in early October would have serious Big Ten Championship implications. Now put your hand down because you are a liar and you need that hand to pick up the pizza you are going to be eating while you watch Northwestern play Michigan in a really good defensive battle – that will have serious Big Ten Championship implications!

13. Notre Dame (4-1)

Last week: 3
Last game: Lost to Clemson, 24-22
Next up: Saturday vs. Navy

One play. Somehow, even though Clemson dominated the game seemingly from the get-go, the Fighting Irish were still one play away. Through all the injuries, and the rain, and everything else, Notre Dame was a play away from being arguably ranked No. 1 heading into this week. It’s a common refrain, but it’s one loss, and it was on the road against a very good opponent. The Fighting Irish can still play their way into the playoff (potentially) if they win out. Looking sharp against an undefeated Navy team would be a great start to their second act.

14. Florida State (3-0)

Last week: 15
Last game: Beat Wake Forest, 24-16
Next up: Saturday vs. Miami

Florida State did not look great against Wake Forest, and that isn’t a knock on the Deacs, who are much improved this year despite their record not really showing it. The ‘Noles are still figuring things out, and that’s okay, a lot of other teams in the Top 25 are. Winning tends to cure a lot of ails, but there isn’t a quarterback like Jameis Winston on the roster to magically pull games out if things get bad. The good news? Florida State’s defense is one of the best in the country, and that’s not changing any time soon.

15. Texas A&M (4-0)

Last week: 15
Last game: Beat Mississippi State, 30-17
Next up: Oct. 17 vs. Alabama

I don’t know that the win over the Bulldogs proved anything one way or the other. I will say this much: The John Chavis hire was one of the best offseason moves in all of college football. Although, guys like Myles Garrett can make just about anyone look good.

16. Stanford (4-1)

Last week: 17
Last game: Beat Arizona, 55-17
Next up: Oct. 15 vs. UCLA

The Cardinal are scoring points. This is a very good thing. And we all maybe owe Desmond Howard an apology.

17. Georgia (4-1)

Last week: 8
Last game: Lost to Alabama, 38-10
Next up: Saturday at Tennessee

The good news for the Bulldogs? The East probably isn’t going to be lost on just one game of SEC play. And Georgia can still play its way into Atlanta if it manages to win out. That’s the fun of controlling your own destiny. The schedule really isn’t that unfavorable for the Dawgs, especially at the tail-end of the year, and as mentioned before, that Florida game is going to be huge.

18. USC (3-1)

Last week: 18
Last game: Beat Arizona State, 42-14
Next up: Oct. 8 vs. Washington

I was tempted to just copy and paste last week’s blurb about USC to see if you even noticed. The Trojans didn’t play last week and probably just sat outside in the sun enjoying the weather while all the rest of us got rained on for a week straight. Not fair.

19. UCLA (4-1)

Last week: 4
Last game: Lost to Arizona State, 38-23
Next up: Oct. 15 at Stanford

The Bruins laid a big ol’ egg against Arizona State, and you can’t do that against a Todd Graham team. Even when the Sun Devils are struggling, they still have enough talent on both sides of the ball to take advantage of your off night. The Bruins are in a similar spot to a lot of Top 25 teams right now – it’s only one loss, the season isn’t over, they aren’t out of the College Football Playoff hunt, and it’s really up to them to play their way in or out of the national conversation.

20. Oklahoma State (5-0)

Last week: 22
Last game: Beat Kansas State, 36-34
Next up: Saturday at West Virginia

What I like most about the Cowboys’ 2015 season is how thrifty they are being. They aren’t trying to blow teams out. They’re taking it easy, winning by just enough points to actually win the game, and they’re likely saving their points for when they need them most. College Football needs more teams that epitomize that Extreme Couponing lifestyle.

21. Toledo (4-0)

Last week: 21
Last game: Beat Ball State, 24-10
Next up: Saturday at Kent State

The Rockets get to hang out at 21 after a nice performance over Ball State on Saturday that saw them hang 24 points in the second quarter and cruise to a win. I wish Toledo had more big games over top opponents to show their stuff, but an undefeated season might keep the Rockets in the Group of Five’s prestige bowl conversation.

22. California (5-0)

Last week: 23
Last game: Beat Washington State, 34-28
Next up: Saturday at Utah

It’s very well possible the Bears were looking ahead to Utah, and for good reason. The Utes pose a serious challenge for California, and somehow, someway, these are the only two undefeated teams left in the Pac-12. None of us would have predicted that entering this season, and that’s why college football is so great. (That, and tailgating, and live mascots.)

23. Michigan (4-1)

Last week: 24
Last game: Beat Maryland, 28-0
Next up: Saturday vs. Northwestern

Maryland is very bad. Michigan and Northwestern’s defenses are very good. The over/under right now in the game on Saturday is 35. 35! And it still might go under, by like, a lot.

24. Iowa (5-0)

Last week: NR
Last game: Beat Wisconsin, 10-6
Next up: Saturday vs. Illinois

Welcome to the Top 25, Iowa. Towels and washcloths are on the bed, the WiFi password is on the dresser, and I’ll make coffee in the morning. Make yourself at home.

25. Temple (4-0)

Last week: 25
Last game: Beat Charlotte, 37-3
Next up: Saturday vs. Tulane

Temple is still ranked. This is the best part of having your own power rankings.

Next Five: Memphis, Duke, Houston, Navy, Sudafed