06.03.08 10 years ago 9 Comments

Somehow the Dallas Cowboys are "America's Team," even though the team is a haven for crooks, cranks, and malcontents.  Even though everyone hates Texas.  Even though they haven't won a playoff game in 11 years.  It probably has something to do with their cheerleaders wearing tassels and cowboy boots.  Regardless, there's plenty of big news in Big D, as cornerback Pacman Jones has been granted partial reinstatement in the NFL, and wide receiver Terrell Owens has received a contract extension and a raise. The Dallas Morning News:

NFL commissioner Roger Goodell on Monday notified Jones that he may participate in the OTAs, minicamp, training camp and preseason games. Goodell will make a final determination on a full reinstatement by Sept. 1, six days before the season opener at Cleveland.

Please Lord bless us with a preseason game in Miami.  DAMMIT!  Pac will have to find a way to make trouble in San Diego instead.  And Hashmarks on T.O.:

[Owner Jerry] Jones ignored his self-imposed rule about paying big money to aging players and gave the 34-year-old a four-year deal worth $34 million… Common sense suggests you don't make a huge financial commitment to a wide receiver in his mid-30s, but the Cowboys obviously believe that T.O. can remain at an elite level for at least two more seasons.

Yes, good call Jerry.  Common sense is fucking lame.  Spending piles of cash on STAR talent, on the other hand — that's what men of action do.  It explains why I owe thousands of dollars on my credit card after my last trip to Cheetah's.

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