Hold On To Your Butts: Dennis Rodman Wrote A Book About Acceptance For Children

We may have found the second book for the With Leather Book Club

Dennis Rodman, the former NBA great whose off-the-court life has included multiple arrests for domestic abuse, a nolo contendere to drunk driving and a tag team pro wrestling match against Karl Malone, has written a children’s book. Because of course he has.

Behold: Dennis The Wild Bull, a story about how being different makes you special, as told through the eyes of a bull that looks and acts exactly like Dennis Rodman.

The Hall of Famer’s book, “Dennis The Wild Bull,” came out today, and fans will immediately recognize Rodman’s influence. The large red bull on the cover has flowing red hair, two nose rings, a tattoo and red stubble under his chin.

“More than anything, I just want little kids today just to understand: Ain’t no matter what you do in life — be different, rich or poor, man — guess what? It’s OK to be who you are pretty much and you’ll be accepted,” Rodman said.

If you want to be “who you are pretty much,” you can pick up the book on Amazon.

I can’t decide which is funnier, the namedropping of Rodman’s previous books in the Associated Press release or Rodman’s follow-up, wherein he describes his ability to write “Dennis Rodman, but an animal” as “pretty much incredible.”

The author, whose previous works include titles such as “Bad as I Wanna Be” and “I Should Be Dead by Now,” chose a different audience this time. He said even now, he is recognized by children who never saw him play, and those are the ones he wanted to reach.

“For a guy like me to be very eccentric, to even go to extremes to write a children’s book with all the wild things I do and make it believable was pretty much incredible,” Rodman said.

Co-written with Dustin Warburton, the book tells the story of Dennis, a bull who is taken away from his family and forced to live with other bulls in a rodeo. Though he looks nothing like them, they come to accept him and they all become friends.

I hope this is a trilogy, and that part one ends with Dennis The Wild Bull going to jail like Not Tank Abbott in Bar Brawler. I also hope that Rodman accidentally hears Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer for the first time next Christmas and just goes “ffffuuuuuuuuu.”

For bonus lulz, here’s the pensive author portrait on the back of the book:

[h/t to Ball Don’t Lie]