Sports

The Lions Fired Their Offensive Coordinator And Promoted A Man Named Jim Bob Cooter

Detroit Lions fans
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First thing’s first, the Detroit Lions just promoted Jim Bob Cooter to offensive coordinator. We’ll get to that later.

Secondly, the Lions are an abomination to professional football in 2015. The offensive line performance against the Vikings on Sunday may go down as the worst the league has ever seen. Quarterback Matthew Stafford was hit thirteen times, sacked seven times and needed X-rays after the game for an injured hand. He’s battled through a season of putrid offensive line play, at times so suspect that fans wondered if the players up front simply didn’t like him.

Of the seven sacks yesterday, several came on blown assignments and poor scheme, leading to rushers in Stafford’s face within a split second of the snap. This screencap gives you an idea of just how bad it was.

With a 1-6 record and virtually no shot at the playoffs, the Lions cleaned house today on the offensive side of the ball, canning offensive coordinator Joe Lombardi and offensive line coaches Jeremiah Washburn and Terry Heffernan. Head coach Jim Caldwell is safe for now but that will likely change at season’s end when the Ford family takes an enema to the franchise and expels GM Martin Mayhew.

Moreover, the biggest news of the day wasn’t who was fired but rather who will step in and call plays for the team in Joe Lombardi’s absence. And your answer is…Jim Bob Cooter, the quarterback coach.

Here is an important photo of Jim Bob.

For what it’s worth, Jim Bob Cooter is generally well-liked around the league, credited with helping the Broncos get to the 2013 Super Bowl. Lions GM Martin Mayhew spoke glowingly about him in the offseason:

“When we bring guys to the table to talk to him about those guys, he has a really good reference point (from) being around Peyton Manning and guys like that,” Mayhew said. “He knows what he’s looking for, and what fits. He’s got a very bright future. I think Coach Caldwell put together an outstanding coaching staff across the board, and Jim Bob is just one of the outstanding coaches we have on our staff.”

So there you have it. The Lions, an organization with one playoff win in 50+ years, just put Jim Bob Cooter in charge of their offense. What a time to be alive and what a terrible time to be a Lions fan.

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