‘Don’t Do Crack, Drink Chocolate Milk’

Last week, Charlie Sheen took time away from his uphill fight to finally attain sobriety nonstop, drug-fueled hooker orgies to offer some words of wisdom to the members of the UCLA baseball team. Sheen had little to say to the team, but I doubt their malleable minds will ever forget the advice they received that day:

“Don’t do crack, drink chocolate milk, and enjoy every moment..thats all I got.” -Charlie Sheen. That’s what he told our baseball team today @RichardBrehaut via Off The Bench

I’m the kind of guy who looks for any and every opportunity to crack a good Charlie Sheen joke, but to be honest, you can’t really find fault with that advice. Crack kills, chocolate milk is delicious, and enjoy every moment. All three are sentiments I can get behind. Before his McGruff the Crime Dog impression, Sheen took batting practice with the team.

After batting practice, Savage asked Charlie to talk to his team about drug use. Charlie obliged and got a standing ovation from the team.

As for his batting skills, Brandon says Charlie — who showed up with his own bat — almost hit a homer. –Off The Bench

I think we can all agree that Charlie Sheen is the right man for the Presidency in 2012. I think he could get a lot of support with a “Hookers and Blow for a Brighter Tomorrow” platform. Video after the jump.

Thanks to @ZachSheldon for the tip.