Elin Nordegren Likes You For Who You Are On The Inside

07.15.11 7 years ago 9 Comments

Tiger Woods is a jerk. He cheated on his beautiful wife, the mother of his two children, with upwards of 60,000 borderline-transvestite pornstars and strippers before exploding into a multimedia tornado of sorrowful remorse and terrible golf. He shouldn’t have done things to make his wife want to beat him to death with a golf club, and we should keep his actions hanging over his head for most of the rest of his life. But hey, just in case you’d tricked yourself into thinking his Swedish model wife Elin Nordegren was somehow a relatable human being betrayed by someone she truly loved, I’d like to direct you to her new boyfriend: Jamie Dingman.

I’m sorry, I’m being presumptuous. I’m sure he’s just like you and me. You know, if “you” were billionaire philanthropist Michael Dingman and I was your globetrotting son.

Dingman is an accomplished emerging-markets veteran who has represented his father’s interests in China for the past six years. In the mid-1990s, he specialized in Russian private equity funds. He also owned an IndyCar team sponsored by World Childhood Foundation, a charity founded by Queen Silvia of Sweden.

He splits his time between China and the Bahamas and recently spent time with Nordegren in Florida and Sweden.

When I was little I wanted to either be a fireman or an emerging-markets veteran.

How do you get to a point in your life where your two defining characteristics are “representing your father’s interests in China” and a specialization in Russian private equity funds? Proving that it’s not who you are but who you’re supposed to be, this gangly Mark Cuban-looking motherf**ker has also bedded Tom Brady’s baby mama Bridget Moynahan and the PRINCESS OF SWEDEN. I didn’t even know Sweden had a princess.

Don’t jump to conclusions: According to “a friend” (thanks, Fox Sports), he’s your everyday, Russian private equity fund-spreading Johnny Appleseed.

“He’s never been so happy. He and Elin have strong feelings for each other,” a friend said. “He’s a classic all-American guy. He’s handsome, a total gentleman and low-key. He’s never been in the press. Elin’s a very lucky girl; he’s a great guy but very private.”

Yes, this all sounds extremely low-key. It must be a wonderful life where you can divorce one of the most accomplished and recognizable athletes of the century and still be able to dismiss his accomplishments to your new boyfriend by saying “lol he played golf”.

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