08.24.09 9 years ago 5 Comments

The AP poll in major college football is the one last remnant of old media that everyone’s trying to finally put asunder. With the cries of babes in the street screaming “Play-off! Play-off!” to the backs of the current regime unwilling to change, the AP is the best thing that illuminates the pecking order on Saturdays across America in the coming fall.

Some suggest not releasing such a list before the season is well underway, to which I say, “Poppycock.” I want to know–if I can’t tell who’s good and who isn’t–who’s enjoying the media’s praise, and which teams are fielding its scorn.

Florida is your preseason No. 1, and by “yours,” I mean “everyone’s.” It’s not like you get them all to yourself. Ass. The Gators were ranked first on 58 of 60 ballots. The other two first-place votes went to…Texas?!

Look, I could see Alabama getting votes, who gave Florida a run for its money in the SEC title game last year and may very well do so again this fall. They’re a young team and Nick Saban is just getting the ball rolling in Tuscaloosa. I could see Oklahoma, who played well enough to get into the BCS title game last year and is bringing most of their defense. But Texas? And Colt McLovin?

The AP is so in the bag for Mack Brown. He’s like the hot girl in math class that gets Bs even though she turns in her homework late and tries to find her hypotenuse sitting in the nude with a handheld mirror. So sick of the love for Texas. But I see that Ohio State is ranked 6th! Alright! They totally earned that preseason ranking…via.

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