A High School Hockey Team Tried To Use Two Goalies And Lost Anyway

The Tenafly coaching staff likely knew it would take a miracle to beat St. Joseph’s of Montvale on Sunday, a top 20 hockey team in New Jersey, according to NJ.com, so the team employed an interesting tactic — use two goaltenders at the same time.

We will never know if it would have worked, as officials immediately ruled it to be an illegal strategy and hit Tenafly with a two-minute delay-of-game penalty.

That appeared to be Tenafly’s only chance at staying close in this game, as St. Joseph’s won 10-0. Kyle Picnic, the goaltender who remained in the game, stopped 37 of 43 shots. Your follow-up question may be, “What about the other four goals? Who allowed those?” Look, this story is about the comedy of a team trying to use two goaltenders at once, so you’ll have to find answers to your New Jersey high school hockey stats questions elsewhere.

But what if Tenafly was allowed to use two goalies? Why would they stand one in front of the other? Wouldn’t that just be a constant screen for Picnic? Why wouldn’t they stand side by side? Throw in the fact the St. Joseph goaltender made five total saves in the win, and just how many shots would Tenafly have generated if it used four skaters the entire game?

Maybe someone has those answers, but we will have to wait for the book. No, seriously.