03.18.08 10 years ago 15 Comments

Believe it or not, I have a lot of respect for dance.  It's an art that requires all sorts of grace and agility and strength that I don't have.  But when an athlete goes on "Dancing with the Stars," I'm just not going to be all that impressed.  Dolphins defensive end Jason Taylor, for example, does things like speed-rush past a 340-pound tackle to drag down another 230-pound pro athlete, then he goes on this show and judges praise his posture.  "Wow, you were really good at standing up straight!"  Taylor also drew a picture of a kitty cat in front of a house for the old British judge, and he absolutely loved it.  He put it on his fridge and everything.

The other thing I can't stand about this video is the unnecessarily staged reality show bullshit.  "My 'poker friends' gave me this pink tutu, so wouldn't it be funny if I wore it in the dance studio?"  And by poker friends he means one of the show's gay or female producers, because men who play poker don't buy gag gifts for other men unless it's fake dog shit or a singing fish mounted on the wall.  It's a stupid fake gag that adds nothing to the show.  Fuck you, network TV.

[Sports by Brooks

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