Kobe Bryant Might Need A Bigger Diamond

As always, we take tabloid gossip about our favorite superstar athletes with a grain of salt because tabloids suck, but we also can’t ignore their reports because they’re usually so hilarious. In the case of Kobe Bryant, well, “once a cheater” and all that jazz. Fresh off a pretty embarrassing 4th quarter choke job against my preseason No. 3 Chicago Bulls, the news around the Los Angeles Lakers is less about Bryant’s 27 points (and 8 turnovers) with a torn ligament in his wrist and more about what will presumably be an incredibly messy divorce from his wife of 11 years, Vanessa.

According to the collection of “professional” poop-throwers known as TMZ, Kobe is super bummed that Vanessa is heading for the big D – and we don’t mean Dallas *spits tobacco* – and now he’s using his two daughters to make Vanessa realize that she can still make more money married to Kobe it work.

Kobe Bryant has NOT given up on saving his marriage … and sources close to the family tell us his two daughters are playing a major role in his effort to reconcile … TMZ has learned.

We’re told Kobe is “deeply depressed” over the situation — and is very concerned about how his daughters will handle growing up in two separate households.

Thanks TMZ, all I wanted for Christmas was a collection of sloppy ellipses. Kobe could very well be trying to salvage his marriage, which would make sense if anyone values more than half of $300 million, but I think we can probably agree that after a 2003 rape allegation that turned into an admitted affair and now these allegations that he cheated with Playmate Jessica Burciaga (above in case you aren’t staring and are actually reading this) among others, it’s going to take a pretty huge ring to get Vanessa to stick around after this one. And I just so happen to have a picture of that ring after the jump.