OJ Got Beat Up In Prison: Updated

02.15.11 7 years ago 4 Comments

OJ Simpson’s quest to find the real killers was derailed in 2008 when he was sentenced to 33 years in Nevada state prison for armed robbery. That mission hit another bump in the road when Simpson got his ass kicked in the prison yard, according to a report released today by the National Enquirer.

Inmates cheered as a muscular young skinhead knocked him to the ground, punching and kicking him to a bloody pulp and inflicting injuries so severe he secretly spent nearly three weeks in the infirmary before he recovered.

The humiliating beating left 63-year-old Simpson in agony – and threw him into a spiral of depression so deep that he’s now afraid to venture out of his cell, divulge sources.[..]

Unknown to the former NFL star, The Juice has been a marked man behind bars ever since white supremacists overheard him brag about his sexual conquests of beautiful white women.

Oh, sure. Label the guy a racist. He had to watch The Naked Gun movies just like the rest of us. Like the Queen of England could ever throw a curveball like that. We’re not idiots, Hollywood!

Via The Score, whose Naked Gun joke was much better than mine.

UPDATE via Will Brinson:

Just got off the phone with Nevada Corrections: “no truth whatsoever” to OJ Simpson story. “He’s perfectly fine and healty” [sic]

Wow. This could seriously damage the credibility of the National Enquirer.

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