The Sixers are an awful, awful basketball team. They’re unwatchable, they’re horrific and at 0-11 they may very well be the worst NBA team of the last decade. In October, Papa John’s Pizza created a promotion with the team they thought would be successful.
“The day after every Sixers win, fans receive 50 percent off their online order at participating Papa John’s locations.”
A few weeks into the season and surprise, surprise, at 0-11 nobody’s buying pizza.
And so there was a revision. A sad, sad change to an already sad promotion.
“When the Sixers score 90, you win at Papa John’s!
“All season long the day after the Sixers score 90 or more points you get 50% OFF your regular menu price online order! The Sixers scored 90 in last night’s game against the Celtics, so you get 50% OFF your entire online order TODAY!”
Pizza is responsible for happiness and smiles and bringing joy into people’s miserable lives. And the Sixers can’t muster one goddamn win for a half-off pie.
Man, this is so, so sad.