Pete Rose Is Getting His Own Reality Show

With the widespread use of social media and, more specifically the popularity of a jackass like Jose Canseco, I’m surprised that we don’t hear more from or about Pete Rose. Hell, I’m surprised that what may or may not be his Twitter account only has 4,000+ followers. But I guess that just means that the 71-year old all-time MLB hits leader has settled into the reality that most people just don’t give a crap about him anymore.

Apparently TLC missed that memo. The network once known as The Learning Channel has famously brought us shows like Toddlers and Tiaras, Jon and Kate Plus 8, 19 Kids and Counting, Sister Wives, and Extreme Couponing. Now, the network is adding a Pete Rose reality show to its stable. Is it about a legendary athlete now in his twilight years, ready to do whatever it takes to prove to the fans who once worshipped him that he was wrong for gambling and lying, and beg the forgiveness of the sport that made him a star so that he might one day enter Cooperstown before he takes his final breath?

No. It’s about him and his Playboy model girlfriend. Good for you, Charlie Hustle.

“She’s got younger kids and I’ve got [four adult] kids, and we go through the same things everybody else does: taking the braces off, making sure they get their education and they go to basketball practice or acting class,” Rose tells EW, adding: “It’s not going to be classless — like it seems like a lot of reality shows aren’t really reality, but our reality show is going to be funny, entertaining, and real.”

The cameras will trail them through such events as Rose taking the family to visit the Hall of Fame in Cooperstown, to Kim getting a breast reduction. “We’re not a traditional family,” says Kim. “We are a total modern-day family, mixing the cultures, the ages, the different backgrounds together. I didn’t even know who Pete Rose was when I first met him. It’s kind of a crazy story, but at the core of every family is love and it’s what TLC wants to show.” Quips Rose: “We’re just a normal family with 4,200 hits.” (Via EW)

“I didn’t know who Pete Rose was when I met him, but then I Googled him and realized that this guy might have a lot of money, so I should start sleeping with him while he’s still married so I can sell my story to the tabloids and become famous. And if that doesn’t work, I can just use his waning notoriety to convince Hugh Hefner to let me pose nude in Playboy, because they’ll let anybody even semi-famous be in Playboy these days.”

Wait, what? Sorry, I lost my train of thought for a second. Rose was one of my baseball heroes growing up, as I met him at a baseball card show in Ft. Lauderdale when I was 8 and he was very cool, but I have no interest in watching this depressing mess. Give me Canseco or give me TLC’s death.