Sports

An Important Breakdown Of The Very Good Dogs In This Year’s Puppy Bowl


The Puppy Bowl is back on Feb. 5, and Puppy Bowl XIII promises to rescue us from what could be a disappointing football game with an overload of pups trying their hearts out to win over America’s love. These are all very good dogs that just want to get out there and play their way into a forever home.

This year’s Puppy Bowl will feature 78 different dogs from 34 different rescue agencies across the country, which means Team Ruff and Team Fluff are full of adorable pups who need very good homes. Here’s a sneak preview of the event, but let’s take a closer look at some of the little guys you’re gonna want to boop on the snout and adopt on Super Bowl Sunday.

Team Fluff

Name: Alexander Hamilpup
Breed: Pomsky
Age: 19 weeks
Shelter: Florida Little Dog Rescue, Florida


Scouting Report:
There’s a million things this dog hasn’t done, but just you wait. It’s in favor of a strong central government and bursting with pride, but also, oh my god look at that little guy’s ears, I bet he wants to be scratched forever and will love you always.

Is It A Good Dog?
A legacy is planting seeds in a garden you never get to see grow, but yes absolutely this is a good dog. Come on now.

Name: Blitz
Breed: Golden Retriever
Age: 15 weeks
Shelter: Miami-Dade County Animal Services, Florida


Scouting Report:
Blitz isn’t much of a linebacker, but tell him to go long, and this little guy will play catch with the best of them. Scouts are thrilled that he will run any route to track down a ball. And fast. He’s also extremely fluffy.

Is It A Good Dog? Is that tiny band of white fluff starting on his forehead and running between his eyes and to his little nose enough of an answer, or do I have to spell everything out for you?

Name: Buddy Love
Breed: Dachsund/Pit Bull mix
Age: 14 weeks
Shelter: Mr. Bones & Co., New York


Scouting Report:
This guy is ready for anything. Filling the A-Gap on a run? Done deal. Snuggling on your stomach while you catch up on BoJack Horseman? He loves Mister Peanut Butter! This cute pup will be your best friend and your best teammate. Loves snacks. Loves you. Always will.

Is It A Good Dog? This is the goodest dog that has ever done good.

Name: Buttons
Breed: Pomeranian/Schnauzer mix
Age: 12 weeks
Shelter: Florida Little Dog Rescue, Florida


Scouting Report:
Buttons is only here so she doesn’t get fined. Not one for standing around and talking, she’s all about that action. And when it’s time to play, watch out. A sleeper for Puppy Bowl MVP, be prepared to see those paws do some dancing on Super Sunday.

Is It A Good Dog? She is unquestionably good, but chaotic good for sure. Very likely to retire early and focus on making a difference in your life post adoption.

Name: Lucky
Breed: Terrier mix
Age: 16 weeks
Shelter: Operation Education Rescue, Tennessee


Scouting Report:
Lucky is an easy pick for dark-horse MVP candidate because it is a very special pup indeed. A crate accident when Lucky was young left her with just three legs. But oh, she is so ready to play. Just give her a chance, coach. Let’s see what Lucky can do out there.

Is It A Good Dog? The dog is good.

Name: Rory
Breed: Poodle mix
Age: 17 weeks
Shelter: Florida Little Dog Rescue, Florida


Scouting Report:
This little guy was rescued from the forest moon of Endor after leaving its arboreal hut in search for new hunter-gathering opportunities following the defeat of the Galactic Empire. Lucky for him, his size and strength make him an ideal tight end in Team Fluff’s offense. This dog is gonna be a (looks around, whispers) force to be reckoned with.

Is It A Good Dog?
The good is with this dog.

Name: Winston
Breed: Australian Shepherd
Age: 14 weeks
Shelter: Double J Dog Ranch, Idaho


Scouting Report:
This little guy is going to be a bit awkward positionally as it grows into its body, but it’s easy to forgive his growing pains when you’re spending hours on the couch with your new favorite combination accent pillow/best friend.

Is It A Good Dog?
Heck yes, this dog is good. Have you even been paying attention?

Team Ruff

Name: Bizmark
Breed: Blue Tick Coonhound
Age: 18 weeks
Shelter: AHeinz57 Pet Rescue & Transport, Iowa


Scouting Report:
This little guy can sniff out a play-action fake at the shake of a tail. But more than anything, Bizmark wants to look deep into your eyes for a bit and make sure you know he appreciates that you’re doing the best you can. Bizmark knows that’s good enough. All he’s looking for is just a friend.

Is It A Good Dog?
Bizmark thinks trying is never failing, and is indeed a Very Good Dog.

Name: Daisy Moses
Breed: Chihuahua mix
Age: 13 weeks
Shelter: Last Hope K9, Massachusetts


Scouting Report:
Oh yes, Daisy Moses wants to play. Can she play right now? And later too? And maybe some more after a nice long nap on the couch? She really thinks playing would be a good idea. I’d advise rooting for Daisy Moses. She really hopes you do.

Is It A Good Dog?
You monster how dare you. (Yes.)

Name: Doobert
Breed: English Pointer
Age: 15 weeks
Shelter: Green Dogs Unleashed, Virginia


Scouting Report:
Poor Doobert here has to overcome having the softest ears on the planet, which makes him a constant target for snuggles from the opposition. Still, this little guy has his focus pointed on hitting the end zone and making you happy.

Is It A Good Dog?
This pooch … this is a good pooch right here.

Name: Foster
Breed: Burmese Mountain Dog
Age: 19 weeks
Shelter: One Tail at a Time, Illinois


Scouting Report:
Great performer at altitude. Excellent at following directions. You tell this dog what you want and he will try so hard to give you everything you’ve ever asked for. Is it Feb. 5 yet? Oh, this pup is ready to shine.

Is It A Good Dog?
Foster does not belong to a home for imaginary bad dogs, because there are none bad dogs.

Name: Puddles
Breed: Cocker/Shih/Tzu mix
Age: 13 weeks
Shelter: Florida Little Dog Rescue, Florida

Scouting Report:
Listen: all these dogs can play. That’s why they’re at this level. They’ve all got talent. But Puddles here, she’s coachable. She absorbs training and loves to learn new tricks, and she’s so good at catching. She’s a student of the game, and that game is being adorable.

Is It A Good Dog?
This special lady has more knowledge in her left paw than you have in your entire body. She’s better than you’ll ever be.

Name: Smooshie
Breed: Shar Pei
Age: 12 weeks
Shelter: Florida Little Dog Rescue, Florida


Scouting Report:
Smooshie is a great dog for the flex position of your fantasy puppy bowl team. But most of all, Smooshie really wants you to know that she is not mad at you, or even disappointed. Those wrinkles are there because she worries. Because she loves you and wants to make sure you’re drinking enough water and practicing proper self-care. This dog thinks you are important.

Is It A Good Dog?
I’m not just shar pei – I’m shar positive this is a good dog.

Name: Striker
Breed: Miniature Pinscher/Shih Tzu mix
Age: 18 weeks
Shelter: Operation Paws for Homes, Virginia


Scouting Report:
Quite possibly the smallest and oldest dog on the roster, this nimble little veteran knows how to make the most of his speed and size. Striker asks for a lot of touches out there on the field, but most importantly? He’s hoping to touch your heart.

Is It A Good Dog?
Oh, I think so. Don’t you?

Good luck to all the dogs out there. It’s gonna be a great game.

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