09.29.07 11 years ago 2 Comments

"Sugar" Shane Mosley has been accused of using BALCO's  "the cream" and "the clear" before a 2003 victory over Oscar De La Hoya:

Mosley on Friday confirmed that he had unknowingly taken some banned substances . . . "Unknowingly, yes, some of the substances they are talking about, were being used as part of the workouts," Mosley told "I didn't know what the hell it was.  I didn't know anything about that stuff. It was something given to me, pushed up on me. I'm a health freak-type of guy. I like to have everything organic, natural."

Public defenders are always incredulous when I tell them this right before the bond hearing, but just like Mr. Mosley, sometimes I can't be sure what I'm ingesting, injecting or inhaling.  It could be grain alcohol, or smack, or spirit of turpentine – I just don't know.  When you're at a soiree where most of the party-goers are packing heat, it's best not be rude.  And you know, when in Rome . . . Anyway, the people in charge should change the name of "the clear" to "the sugar" in honor of Shane.  That way, we can discreetly ask for cream and sugar in our beverages at the local gym to achieve more robust physiques.  Or, you could ask for whatever Oscar De La Hoya is taking to achieve a standing ovation at the local female impersonator club after your rendition of "If I Could Turn Back Time". -KD 

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