01.18.10 8 years ago 3 Comments

Cleveland Cavaliers big man Shaquille O’Neal is averaging 22 minutes a game this season, but he might be racking up the equivalent of billable hours in court. See what I did there? Anyway, Shaq’s latest foray into court involves his suit for all trademark rights to the word “Shaqtus.” Apparently, someone did in fact touch the shaqtus.

According to a lawsuit filed in Las Vegas, Shaq claims a random businessman beat him to the punch in registering for the Shaqtus trademark — and it’s causing a serious problem for Shaq’s business.

ESPN blew the guy off — but now Shaq is looking to take back full control of the Shaqtus trademark. –TMZ.

This came on the heels of the pending lawsuit filed by his former alleged mistress, Vanessa Lopez. I’d start calling her “V-Lo,” but that sounds kinda stupid and it probably won’t catch on anyway. At least Shaq remembered to pay somebody off, according to a report centered around Swedish “model” Dominica Westling, whom we were good enough to feature below. Hopefully this makes up for all the Favre gushing this morning. Come on, you know you can’t stay mad at me…

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