02.11.09 10 years ago 20 Comments

Two coaches for Toronto FC of the MLS had to jump out of the way when an 8-year-old driving a van nearly hit them.  The boy was driving at the behest of his father, who — to be fair — was too drunk to drive.  So it was almost responsible parenting.

Witnesses said the boy crashed the van into a tree, shattering the driver’s side rear window, after the two coaches got out of the way. The boy then crashed a second time into a tree, damaging the car’s radiator, the police report said.

When police arrived, Belanger fell to the ground after he dropped his wallet. When he fell, he slammed his face on the pavement, leaving a gash on the bridge of his nose.

The boy told police his father took “liquid medicine in order to feel better.” He pointed to an empty bottle of Canadian whiskey in the vehicle.

A good question here would be, “Wait, so why is a cat driving the car in the picture?”  And I’ll be honest, I don’t really have a good answer for that.  I just think cats are funnier than kids.  Just be glad I didn’t replace the dad with a side of bacon.


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