First of all, I’d like to let my friends know that if you ever take a video of me becoming emotional over sports and then distribute it to websites, I will sue you and your children into a level of destitution that Lin-Manuel Miranda will write a musical about it. No one needs to see me bargaining with God before exploding into tears as Plaxico Burress catches a touchdown pass from Eli Manning.
This Tennessee football fan and fellow cargo shorts enthusiast (#TeamCargoShorts) does not have the same ground rules with his friends, so him flipping out over the Volunteers’ 34-31 comeback win against Georgia on Saturday will live on the internet forever. While I screamed things like, “Shatter Brady’s pelvis damn it!” and “Why didn’t I have Belichick killed this week?” while watching my team play in a Super Bowl, this gentleman got emotional over a regular-season win that moved his team to 5-0.
Which one of us is really worse?
Okay, it’s me, but still.
The problem now becomes: Where does this guy go from here? What if Tennessee knocks off Alabama in two weeks? What if the Vols win a playoff game or national championship game? How does he up the stakes?
As long as he’s wearing cargo shorts in future videos, I’m on his side.