The Most Shocking News Of 2012

02.07.12 6 years ago 5 Comments

For the past few months, Kim Kardashian and her family of reality TV gypsies have tried their hardest to play the PR game in the wake of her divorce from New Jersey Nets forward Kris Humphries. As we’ve discussed with great fervor and joy, the public response to her divorce after 72 days of marriage was fiery and hateful, as the Kardashians tried very hard to play the role of victims after milking Kim’s big day for approximately $17 million. Allegedly.

The PR game, of course, was controlled by the producers of Khloe and Kim Take New York, as each episode of the show made Humphries out to be the most despicable man on the planet. Some of us knew better than that – because he’s too dumb to be evil – but Humphries still needed a chance to expose the actual reality and not E!’s warped version.

BOOM! Welcome to divorce court.

Sources tell us … Kris and his lawyer, Lee Hutton, want to “expose the M.O. of reality TV” by proving Kim had no intention of staying married to him, but just wanted big ratings for her reality show.

Now here’s the irony. The duo wants to prove their point by asking the judge to allow TMZ and TV stations to broadcast the trial — something that the judge might find a tad hypocritical … not that we’re complaining. (Via TMZ)

Ummmmm, no. That’s not what hypocritical means, guys. Hypocritical would be Humphries selling the rights to air the divorce after he and his management team edits it to show the “reality” that he wants to show.

What Humphries and his lawyer want to do is broadcast the divorce hearings so us jerkholes that have been bagging on him can see the real truth – that Kim and her mom, Kris Jenner, are manipulative divas with no talent other than preying on the dimwitted for the sake of profit, and that the wedding was their ultimate masterpiece.

But of course TMZ points out one big problem…

We’ve learned the prenup is extremely long and complicated … accounting for what would happen years into the future. Why would she go through the time and trouble of having a long prenup if she planned on pulling the plug on the marriage within a few months?

*puts on black robe, bangs gavel*

I’ll handle this one, your honor. It’s because she didn’t want to give Humphries any of the wedding money.

*takes off robe, flushes*

(Banner via… Funny or Die, I think.)

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