The Rex Ryan Tattoo Question Is Missing An Important Follow-up

“My new tat means, believe in yourself, which I got no problem doing.”

That’s the explanation for New York Jets head coach Rex Ryan’s brand-new calf tattoo provided in a Facebook video. The comments on the video ask all kinds of questions, like “is this your first tattoo” and “REALLY? LOL” and some bickering about who is and isn’t a Jets fan (on a Jets video on a Jets Facebook page), but nobody has posted the most important follow-up question: HOW does this mean “believe in yourself”?

And I don’t want that to sound dismissive, because I have multiple tattoos and understand how ink can feel like an inseparable part of your body and mean something intensely personal, but I want to know what tribal doctrine Ryan was referencing when he decided to get Rainbow Road from Super Mario Kart on his leg. How does this mean “believe in yourself”, Rex? Because when you walked into the tattoo parlor they had this on the wall with “believe in yourself” under it? Did you sit down in the chair blind and tell the artist you want something that means “believe in yourself”? That doesn’t f**king mean anything. I have a tattoo of Charlotte from Charlotte’s Web on my arm because it is my favorite book and helped shape me as an ethical person, and because my late Grandmother used to read it to me when I was little. I didn’t get it because it means “spread your wings and fly”. It also doesn’t mean “you deserve to be a champion”.

Honestly, I guess if anybody would take “believe in yourself” to mean something personally significant it’d be someone like Rex Ryan. Maybe he can get the outline of a butterfly with a tiger’s face inside that means “hope”. Here’s some kanji that says “love, destiny” but it also means “come on, you can do it”.