Sports

Let’s Remember The Rock’s Most Obscure On-Screen Appearances

the rock

In the dark days before he established himself as “franchise viagra” (sorry, Brendan Fraser), Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson spent most of his time kicking ass in WWE, winning 17 championships and headlining five WrestleManias. When he wasn’t dishing out “The People’s Elbow,” Johnson could occasionally be seen in hilarious cameos that displayed his star charisma. Now, he’s busy being one of the nicest guys in Hollywood, slaying on social media, and saving the world on the big screen. But before you go see San Andreas in theaters this weekend, or tune into his upcoming HBO show, Ballers, check out some of The Rock’s most obscure on-screen appearances.

Hannah Montana (2007)

In this episode, Hannah tries to snag an embarrassing picture of The Rock (who dons full makeup at one point during a makeover) in order to trade it with a publisher for a picture that will reveal her secret identity. Everything works out in the end, though, because The Rock makes everything better, and because Miley Cyrus was all about wholesome messages in a time before wrecking ball rides.

That ’70s Show (1999)

The gang goes to a wrestling match in Kenosha and drags Red along for the ride. Johnson plays his actual father, Rocky, a fellow wrestler who mentions the big hopes that he has for his son’s future while signing an autograph and recovering from midget bites.

Cory in the House (2007)

Is there a person who wouldn’t want to see The Rock take part in a tiny tea party? I’m going to guess no. We all get our wish here, as Johnson visits this Disney Channel show about a kid who lives in the White House, only to find that there’s no one there to greet him except the president’s tiny daughter. Cuteness ensues, and “The Rock” Obama does not appear.

Star Trek Voyager (2000)

When Seven of Nine and Tuvok are stranded in the Delta Quadrant, Seven is forced to fight The Champion (Johnson) in order to get Tuvok the medical attention that he needs. This episode of Star Trek: Voyager, was a crossover event with UPN’s WWF SmackDown, and was unsurprisingly panned by fans.

Family Guy (2010)

Here, The Rock recreates cartoon sex with action figures while staring into the camera. It’s vastly more entertaining than his other “appearance,” when, in typical Family Guy fashion, racial humor was deployed to discuss Rock’s ambiguous family heritage.

Reno 911: Miami (2007)

In this big screen version of the Comedy Central show (it counts!), the hapless Reno 911 team rolls into Miami to deal with a terrorist attack, and Johnson shows up as a SWAT agent to brief them on the mission. Unfortunately, he quickly makes a grievous error and blows himself up with a grenade. He fares much better as DSS Agent Hobbs in the Fast and Furious franchise, wouldn’t you agree?

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