The Tampa Bay Rays Are The Best At Giving Stuff Away

02.18.13 5 years ago 7 Comments

You wish, Yankees.

With Spring Training here, it’s time for the most important part of any Major League Baseball preseason – checking out what kind of free stuff teams will be giving away this season. Naturally, most major market and successful teams worth a lick will be giving away the standards like t-shirts and hats, but teams that don’t do as well in drawing fans are sort of like fat girls in the bedroom, in that they need to be better at… certain things.

No team knows this better than the Tampa Bay Devil Rays, who are trying to gain more fan support not only for the sake of making money, but also to secure a new stadium deal. Of course this means that the team would need some pretty sweet freebies for the Rays faithful, and according to Tampa Bay Times beat writer Marc Topkin, Rays fans will be getting only the best this season.

On April 24, the Rays will celebrate their lovable old fart hipster manager Joe Maddon with this strange-yet-adorable garden gnome:

But the real gem will be given away three days earlier, as the Rays are giving out bobblehead dolls to honor David Price’s French bulldog, Astro.

But if I may, I’d like to take this opportunity, as a baseball fan living in Central Florida, to give the Rays some feedback on their efforts, because I am, after all, the type of fan that they’re desperately trying to attract. Instead of giving away a bobblehead of Price’s French bulldog, how about giving me an actual French bulldog?

I would attend at least three games this season. Ball’s in your court, Rays.

(Original banner via Shutterstock)

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