Tiger Woods C*ckblocked By Wife, Who Wants $750 Mil

05.27.10 8 years ago 6 Comments

The tortuous volume of angst continues to build in Tiger Woods’ loins as his legal team continues to hash out the terms of his divorce with the former and soon to be again Elin Nordegren. I don’t know when a report of a still technically married man unable to soothe his burning desires within suddenly became news, but we’re rolling with it.

Despite Tiger Woods’ imminent divorce from wife of five years Elin, 30, an insider tells Us Weekly his legal team told him he can’t date until the split is finalized. “Elin’s building a character case (based on his serial philandering),” the insider says. “Elin’s team is watching (Tiger’s) every move.”

Her goal? “She wants more money than Michael Jordan’s ex got,” another source says, referring to the former NBA star’s $168 million payout to his ex-wife. –MSNBC.

The last number we heard was $750 million, and there’s a good chance that she’ll get it if she’ll comply with Tiger’s requests regarding visitation rights of his two kids. Though for that matter, I’d simply refer them to the landmark decision of Camper Is Rocking v. Don’t Come A-knocking. Truly a high water mark for American jurisprudence.

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