Vick’s Fantasy Football Numbers Were Just Sick

11.16.10 7 years ago 12 Comments

Josh will occasionally write about the nine fantasy leagues in which he participates. Yep, nine. Those of you seeking a place to gripe about any of your teams are encouraged to do so in the comments. I’ll ship off a box of P&G products to whoever has the best fantasy anecdote. Haters can keep walkin’.

I read somewhere today that Michael Vick’s awesome performance against Washington last night was vindication in the wake of his potential being “mis-evaluated” upon his release from prison in July of 2009. Give credit: Vick’s six-touchdown masterpiece certainly ends the notion that Vick is in any sort of “comeback.” In fact, one would be hard-pressed to argue that Vick did anything with the Falcons that rivaled last night’s game (Yes, that big playoff win at Lambeau Field in ’03 comes to mind, but that’s it). The guy looked awesome, hanging 28 on a Redskins team that had two weeks to prepare for him. That’s 28 points in the first quarter. Vick didn’t look like Atlanta Falcons Vick last night. He looked like “Madden 2004 Vick.” With a throwing accuracy boost.

But let’s break it down. Vick was a talented but lazy playmaker during his days with the Falcons. And then he killed a bunch of dogs and went to jail, and some people take that to mean that we can’t talk about Vick killing dogs any more, which is ludicrous. It’s really the first chapter (or at least the prologue) of the story of Vick 2.0, and explaining anything about what Vick did last night starts with that how he rebuilt himself from that dubious episode of his life.

Vick managed to sign with a good organization. He got involved in his community, and others, speaking about how he jeopardized his livelihood. Whether or not one questions the sincerity of Vick’s community service, he’s doing it, which is more than most other people do. He waited behind Donovan McNabb. He worked. He waited behind Kevin Kolb. He worked some more. When his time came, he made the most of it.

Last night, we did not see some second-string wildcat gimmick quarterback. We saw a guy that had had a full offseason to polish his craft. So for those of you to say that like it’s the end of the O.J. trial need to just take a step back and count the bread crumbs. This was not pre-destined; it was something that he had to go out and earn each day. Last night, it was fantasy owners of Vick that were rewarded. In this coming offseason, it’ll be Vick.

Gratuitous Recap Of My Gratuitous Fantasy Participation In Week 10.

DayQuil Fighter Of The NyQuil, BFL: WON (7-3 on the year, 2nd in division). This is the Blogger Fantasy League sponsored by P&G (hence the aforementioned giveaway), and Team Vicks is having a pretty damn good year. Again, that’s not Michael Vick plural, but rather a brand of over-the-counter cold and flu relief products. P&G is sending the winner of this league to Super Bowl XLV, and I’m doing well for myself.

I made the dubious decision of benching Peyton Manning in favor of Kyle Orton, who has been having a monster year (speaking of quarterbacks enjoying their own personal renaissance). And I was rewarded for it. Orton put up 27 fantasy points to push me past Aaron Schatz of Football Outsiders. You can find out more info on our league and the whole program, Take It To The House, at that link.

Whore Island Islanders, KSK Keeper League: Lost (5-5, 7th). The top six of 14 make the playoffs in this league, but only the top four get paid, so this was a game that I really needed. I was beating fellow BFLer Dan Shanoff by 10 points. He had David Akers. I don’t think I need to explain the rest.

Also, for those of you that know Sports Pickle‘s DJ Gallo, please go through his computer and send me whatever spreadsheets you might find in there. In the three preceding years that I’ve run this league, that little bastard has finished first, ninth, and first. I think he had the kid two years ago. Apparently the only way to stop Gallo in fantasy is to procreate with him.

Bulletproof Sweatpants, JZFL: Lost (1-9, 11th). Somehow, I’m not dead last in this league, and that “somehow” is named Lindsey, our first-year owner who must have stolen my strategy guide for this league (and, like any woman, improved upon it). How bad is my team in this league? I’m starting Javon Ringer. Yeah.

I also run this league, and this will be the fifth straight year out of five that I finish with a losing record. Which begs the question: when is the right time to blow up your own league? Is there a right time? It would be, at the very least, tasteless to try to get out of a league just because I suck in it…and a keeper league at that.

Ready Set Dogfight, UFSL: WON (5-3-2, 3rd). Somehow, there’s another guy in this league that also has two ties. It might be time to go to fractional scoring. I was playing against Michael Turner, who scored three points. This is part of an all-sports league that I play in, but football is weighted the most toward the overall score. I’m also first in college pick’em and in fantasy basketball. I’m a guru!

[Team name redacted], Purple Camo: Lost (1-9, 14th). I am not a guru. I just lost to the guy that drafted Sidney Rice 17th overall in our draft. And he is 6-4. It probably didn’t help that I decided to start Ryan Mathews and Green Bay’s D, both of which were on byes this week. I also started Tashard Choice, who chose to do absolutely nothing on Sunday. If only I had been so wise…

Hey That’s My Camel, Rock Lobster League: WON (6-4, 4th). This is the “locked roster” league, but with the much-improved name that also honors the B-52’s. I won by 100 points over @PearlBullets, which might have been due to a bookeeping error by one of the Yahoo! gnomes.

Box Lunch, Buy-Curious League: Lost (1-9, 12th). Online auction league, my first ever. Former WL contributor Amber Jones is STILL leading the standings in this league. Who would have thought that the woman would be wisest with the money?

[Team name redacted], Lazy Football: WON (6-4, 1st). Three teams in this league are 6-4. The other three are 4-6. Never, ever run a league with less than 10 teams. In fact, never, ever run a fantasy league. It’s just trouble topped off with paperwork and shame.

Fantasy Player That Decided To Take A Sick Day.

I mentioned that I benched Peyton Manning in one of my money leagues in place of Kyle Orton. I might tear out my rotator cuff patting myself on the back for that today, as Manning underwhelmed against the Bengals Sunday with only 185 yards passing and no TDs of which to speak. Pittsburgh RB Rashard Mendenhall (55 yards total offense, no TDs), and even “Purple Jesus” Adrian Peterson (75 yards, no TDs) had trouble getting out of first gear as well.

Fantasy Football Video Most Likely Produced By Enemies Of The United States.

This is Morgan and Brett from “The Savannah Fantasy News Network,” and I’m not convinced that this isn’t an actual news feed broadcast from that rural Georgia city. Or this could be a screen test for Anchorman 2. I really don’t know, but they mention Arian Foster. Of course they mentioned Arian; they’re from the south. I didn’t knew, either.

Late Waiver Pickup That Sounds Kinda Batsh*t At First Brush. Redskins RB Keiland Williams is somebody to keep an eye on. After his Monday night game (139 total yards, 3 TDs), Williams looks like an attractive late-week pickup if Clinton Portis and Ryan Torain can’t stay healthy. He’s currently only owned in 8 percent of all Yahoo! leagues. That will certainly change this week. I also like Chiefs QB Matt Cassel in the pass-happy AFC West (46 percent owned), who has 12 TD tosses in his last five games.

More fantasy football updates as we get closer to the playoffs. Just remember to never start Lee Evans. Ever.

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