Some classy Celtics fan has offered his wife up on Craigslist in exchange for tickets to any remaining NBA Finals game in Boston. The most tragic part of this is not so much that he views his wife as a fungible commodity but that he really doesn't understand how these exchanges work.
“Trade my hot wife for 2 celts tickets! – $2 – (medford),” read the ad placed by Kyle Carter on the popular online classifieds service this past Saturday.
Contrary to what some are assuming, it is a very decent proposal Carter has in mind. He and his wife are only looking for a basic dinner date, no hanky-panky.
Seriously? Who in the wide world of watersports is going to give up playoff basketball tickets for the right to feed your fucking wife and get no sex afterwards? You might as well burn the tickets and yourself then have a squad of guys in panda costumes shoot you with automatic rifles while you're engulfed in flames. Or just burn Boston to cinders and eliminate people who don't understand the principles of fair trade or pronouncing the letter R.