With Leather’s Watch This: Our Favorite Exotic Dancers Are Ready For March Madness

Senior Writer

With a little more than a week remaining until the 2013 NCAA Tournament tips off, it’s important for people to start determining where they will watch their favorite teams. Or in my case, I need to figure out where I’m going to pretend that I’m a huge Duke and/or Indiana fan, since my team decided to get banned from postseason play this year. Eh, who am I kidding? I pretend to be a Duke fan every year.

Anywho, as usual I am leaning toward watching sports in the comfort of my home away from home, Rick’s Cabaret in New York City. Some people may try to argue that I’ve never been to New York City and that I’m afraid of talking to women, but they’re just haters. Anyway, my girls at Rick’s are all fired up to watch Duke, Indiana or whichever team I end up cheering for win the NCAA Championship.

We love basketball,” said Rick’s Cabaret Girl Kelsey. “You can catch all the College Basketball games at Rick’s on the high def TVs, and there are over 100 hot girls to keep you entertained in case the game is a blow-out.”

“If you’re going to Madison Square Garden for the Big East games, you should come see me and the beautiful Rick’s Girls right after. We’re just one block away,” she purred.

“I can talk basketball with you, and then I’ll be happy to take off my clothes for you and show you my body–ha ha,” promised Rick’s Cabaret Girl Gianna.

She is excited to meet the fans, and also some college hoop stars. “There is always a Pro athlete from some team here almost every night. I’ve met so many. But I want to meet the NBA future stars,” she explained. “They have to be 21 to come here,” she added.

As long as the girls aren’t 21, am I right, fellas? *high fives loneliness*

Colonial Basketball Championship: James Madison vs. Northeastern – 7 PM ET on NBC Sports

“Finally, someone is forced to watch this stupid sports network,” the executive sneered as he signed the order for 10 more seasons of 1600 Penn.

Sun Belt Basketball Championship: Western Kentucky vs. FIU – 7 PM ET on ESPN

Southern Basketball Championship: Charleston vs. Davidson – 7 PM ET on ESPN 2

Wow, these games should be exciting. I will, however, be watching this woman jump on a slide:

WWE Monday Night Raw – 8 PM ET on USA

How the hell am I supposed to watch this when I’m so torn over Brooke Hogan and Bully Ray breaking up? How could you do this, Bully Ray? I can’t help but feel partially responsible.

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