That wasn’t the best National Anthem I’ve ever heard, but it certainly wasn’t the worst or even what I expected from a comedian like Rob Delaney. Delaney performed the National Anthem at a Los Angeles Dodgers game after he teased it on Twitter and most people thought he was joking. But sure enough it happened. So what was I expecting? I don’t know, maybe an Enrico Palazzo or a rendition using only mouth farts.
That doesn’t mean I don’t want someone to perform a mouth fart version of the Star-Spangled Banner. In fact, it would be awesome if it was a young girl or basically someone that you’d never expect it from. Like, even if one of those fat opera dudes came out, I’d probably think, “There’s a 25% chance that this guy mouth farts the National Anthem”. But if a sheepish elementary school girl walked out with her parents and she was too nervous to start and her mom was like, “It’s okay, honey, go ahead” and then she like *FART NOISE*… that would be AWESOME.
WWE Monday Night Raw – 8 PM ET on USA
I ran across this story earlier today. It’s absolutely awful, obviously, and I hope the guy is locked in a cage with angry dogs, but doesn’t he look like HHH’s brother?
ACC Softball Pregame – 6:30 PM ET on ESPN U
NCAA Softball: Virginia Tech at Virginia – 7 PM ET on ESPN U
This would be awesome if they delivered all team promos like professional wrestling promos. Like, if Virginia Tech’s pitcher storms on set and shouts, “LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING, VIRGINIA!” But then, all sports should have that. It would be the greatest marriage of sports and entertainment to date.
NBA Playoffs: Bulls at Nets – 7 PM ET on TNT
NBA Playoffs: Thunder at Rockets – 9:30 PM ET on TNT
I don’t even want to watch anymore of the playoffs because that triple OT game between the Bulls and the Nets was the best we’re going to see in this postseason. In fact, if someone at the NBA Network could edit the overtime officiating out of that game so the “Look at me!” refs could stop ruining the action, that would be fantastic.
Also, how did the Nets not win that game once half of the Bulls fouled out? It blows my mind that a team with an $85 million roster isn’t way more dominant.
MLB: Nationals at Braves – 7 PM ET on ESPN
The only time I ever complain about the baseball season being too long is when my team has reliever troubles, and right now the Cardinals are making me wish the season was two weeks long.
These dogs agree.
