You know, stealing from a church is a fairly bad idea to begin with. Nobody’s on your side when you steal from a church. Stealing the church computer to look at porn is likely a worse idea. Not that this stopped Troy Ridling, and that was just the beginning of his bad ideas.
Ridling was a former parishioner of Owasso First Assembly of God, and apparently a man who can’t swing a smartphone. Ridling, aware of the porny goodness on the Internet, promptly let himself in, stole the computer and split. But there was a surprise waiting for him when he hooked it up to the Internet: Shockingly, churches tend to install porn-blocking software.
This is where Ridling goes down in the history books. He called the porn filter company and demanded they remove the software:
Police say Ridling even contacted Covenant Eyes to try and get them to take down the monitoring software on the computer. He was denied and the call allowed officers to track him down.
On a related note, Covenant Eyes sounds like a Cure album. Anyway, Ridling was promptly caught and, demonstrating the criminal skills that served him so well, denied he’d stolen the computer even as the police were trucking it out of his house. Needless to say Ridling is locked up and looking at felony charges, while the church will be getting its computer back. Hopefully, they disinfect it first.