Andy Cohen Hates Adorable Children

03.01.11 7 years ago 12 Comments

Andy Cohen — the Bravo executive who perniciously fills our lives with endless iterations of squabbling “Real Housewives” who are never actually housewives — was a guest on MSNBC’s execrable “Morning Joe” today, where he helped analyze the crappiness of this year’s Oscar telecast. Was it James Franco’s fault? Did people not care because all the big categories were virtual locks? No, according to Cohen, the P.S. 22 choir was the worst part of the show.

Like, I don’t need to see that. It was just bad. It was just awful. It was horrible. A public school chorus singing “Somewhere Over the Rainbow.” I literally — if I wasn’t going to go out to some parties I would have slit ‘em right then. It was the worst. I was looking for a knife to stick in my eyes, it was so terrible. […] We don’t want to see this. It just ruined everything.

That’s right: if Andy Cohen didn’t have totally fabu parties to go to, he LITERALLY would have committed suicide because of children singing. You can read more about this story and the Real Housewives in my new pamphlet “Andy Cohen is a Piece of Sh*t.”

Video below. In fairness — not that Cohen deserves it — just before he says how much he hated the children, he says that he loves public school kids. Children-bashing starts around the 3:30 mark.

[NYT/City Room via MovieLine]

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