Adam Reed couldn’t believe that fans were able to solve that brilliant Archer scavenger hunt from season six. Hell, he couldn’t believe that it had been created, because when a couple of “numbers guys” came to him with the idea for a top-secret, insanely well-hidden tribute to Dr. Krieger, he barely understood it. But the plan was launched, and the beloved FX animated series eventually won an Emmy for the idea, and it wasn’t just any Emmy, as Lucky Yates recently told us. The Emmys invented an award solely for this diabolical concept, and now it’s time for the Archer team to make a little more shelf space, because the second scavenger hunt is even more complex.
When Reed confirmed to us that a second hunt was in the works for Archer’s seventh season, he wouldn’t offer us any clues to get the fun started, but the good news is that this one is a lot easier for fans to dive into because the first clue was hidden in plain sight. In fact, Reddit’s cyber-sleuths are already hot on the trail, but for the average Archer fan, we can actually start the hunt together this time. Let’s go ahead and get elbow-deep (phrasing) in this season’s scavenger hunt.
Clue 1: The Briefing Room
In the season seven premiere, “The Figgis Agency,” during Cyril’s brief power struggle with Sterling over who gives the orders, there are some newspaper images on the screen. At the top of the screen, there’s a web domain: Figgis.agency/deane. Pretty darn simple, eh? So simple, in fact, that the Archer team wanted fans to think that it was so obvious that it could not be the first clue. However, it was as legitimate as it was simple, and step two was even easier: Click login and begin your quest.
Clue 2: MILTON!
Once you’ve logged into the Figgis Agency’s website, there are plenty of files to go through. I don’t want to do all the legwork for you, even though you shouldn’t be reading this far if you’re trying to solve the puzzle on your own, but if you snoop enough, you’ll find Krieger’s super boring video game: Milton: Toast to Toast. You play as the lovable copier-turned-toaster Milton, and you have to drive him 237 miles to Los Angeles. If you are an impatient detective, your quest will likely end here. Milton tops out at 3 mph, so you’ll be sitting there with your finger on the up arrow for a while. Fortunately, the music is awesome.
The key to this clue, however, is paying close attention to the billboards, as they spell out a code in flag semaphore, which Google tells me is “an alphabet signaling system based on the waving of a pair of hand-held flags in a particular pattern.” Wow, okay. Anyway, the aforementioned cyber-sleuths already figured this out. According to our Archer sources, the game was hacked and the billboards were extracted. The joke was on them, though, because the Archer team anticipated this and labeled the files by employee names, and the correct order is based on their desks in the studio office. The only way to determine this, then, is to play the game and spend three hours driving Milton to LA.
They are so lucky I love this show so much.
Clue 3: Escape from Krieger’s Kastle
In Krieger’s “MISC” folder, you’ll next find a file labeled “Krieger’s Kastle.” This is a document, on Figgis Agency letterhead, that offers a “totally new kind of gaming experience.”
Basically, Doctor Dipshit has created “the world’s largest virtual online community” for reasons that you can already imagine if you’re a fan of Archer’s most mysterious and perverted character, and the next clue is in this document. Under the “Instructions,” you can learn how to access Krieger’s Kastle, depending on which OS you use, and you’ll be on your way to the Telnet address.
Once inside the Kastle – again, we’re dealing with scavenger hunt spoilers here in case you’re trying to find your own way – a computer will request Milton’s serial number. Where the hell do you find that? In the season six DVD extras, of course. (Yes, we are fully down the nerd hole here, so don’t go acting high and mighty now.) Enter the serial number and you’ll find Milton’s service manual, which is 1,200 pages of binary code. The f*ck do you do with 1,200 pages of binary code? You use your Magic Eye, genius.
As you can see (hopefully), the Magic Eye shows us a maze. From here, we’re going to piggyback on the path of the Reddit sleuths who are still streets ahead of us, as they should be. There are apparently a ton of clues in Krieger’s Kastle, but they’re for other puzzles. The theme of this particular scavenger hunt is distractions, so if you latch onto the wrong clues, you’re going to get lost. Again, it’s a maze, and that’s why the goal is to map out Krieger’s Kastle, which gives us a new maze, as tracked by those sleuths.
Back in the Figgis Agency website, a mysterious puzzle was discovered, and the Reddit team surmised that it was a CPU socket, and that the Magic Eye maze and Krieger’s Kastle maze are just pieces of a much larger puzzle that fit into the socket. I know, right — what in the hell is even going on at this point?
Clue ???: What about the unsolved mysteries?
According to our Archer sources, there are 14 remaining pieces to the CPU socket puzzle, and the clues will be revealed in the coming weeks. Still, there are certain mysteries that remain, including a DNA test file and this six-minute ASCII animation video:
In last week’s episode, “Motherless Child,” the computer screens featured several puzzles that sleuths have yet to even discover. That’s why next week’s episode, “Bel Panto: Part 2,” promises to feature all of the puzzles in one shot. Gee, thanks for making this all sooooooo much easier.
Also, what on Earth is happening in this seriously creepy bathroom surveillance footage? You know what… never mind. Some mysteries don’t need to be solved.