‘Celebrity Rehab’ to Star No One

04.28.10 8 years ago 7 Comments

“Celebrity Rehab” is gearing up for another season of not being watched, and the show’s casting agents have set their sights on people you’ve actually heard of for once: Charlie Sheen, his wife Brooke Mueller, Lindsay Lohan, Heather Locklear, and Jenna Jameson. Of course, none of them have actually agreed to do the show. But in TMZ’s world, in the absence of news, the reverse of news is news.

As for Lindsay, we’re told the show recently offered her $1 million to appear on “Celeb Rehab” as well as “Sober House” and a third possible spin-off. Show sources say they were told Lindsay had no interest, partly because she doesn’t think she has a problem and partly because she wants nothing to do with Dr. Drew.

To be fair to Dr. Drew, Lindsay wants nothing to do with anyone who doesn’t have coke.

Show sources say they were shut down with Heather Locklear as well — again, the show sources say they were told Heather doesn’t have a problem. And, the sources say they were shut down by Brooke Mueller. Undaunted, they say they’re now going after Charlie Sheen — perhaps hoping he’ll have time on his hands if he doesn’t re-sign with “Two and a Half Men.”

Filming for the new season is scheduled to begin in two weeks, so at this point I’m guessing the cast will be Jesse James, three former cast members of VH1 reality shows, and four stuffed animals to be named later.

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