If you want your son to be a famous Hollywood actor, well, hopefully you gave birth to him about 30-40 years ago, and named him Chris. We’re living in the golden era of Chrises. There’s Parks and Recreation doofus and Guardians of the Galaxy, Vol 2.‘s Star-Lord, Chris Pratt; Captain America, Chris Evans; Norse god, Chris Hemsworth; and Captain Kirk, Chris Pine. Pine is probably the least famous of the four, despite starring in three Star Trek movies, the Best Picture-nominated Hell or High Water, and the Disney musical Into the Woods (he was the best thing about the movie), but no one on SNL, especially Leslie Jones and Kate McKinnon, knows who he is.
So during his cold open, Pine explained the obvious differences.
It’s quite simple to tell them apart: Chris Pine isn’t Chris Evans, even though they both play a character named Steve in a superhero movie (Steve Trevor in Wonder Woman vs. Steven Rogers in Captain America), and he’s not Chris Pratt or Chris Hemsworth, even though they’re also both muscular, attractive white men in superhero movies (Guardians and Thor: Ragnarok). See? Simple.
This is why I’m glad I’m a Josh. We’re all — Hartnett, Duhamel, Hutcherson, Gad, me — mediocre at best.
