Do Not Ship: 8 TV Couples That Should Never Hook Up

Senior Pop Culture Editor
05.21.14 45 Comments
don peggy


For seven seasons on 30 Rock, Jack and Liz were always “won’t they,” and never “will they.” It was great. No forced drama, no awkwardness, no May sweeps stunts, but yes Elizabeth Banks and Jon Hamm! Not every show can get away with having their male and female leads never hook up (if only…), but that’s why 30 Rock was better than most shows. Here are eight TV series that should take note of Jack and Liz’s not-relationship, and not write themselves into a corner with an unnecessary hook up.

1. Don and Peggy (Mad Men)

don peggy


Don is many things to Peggy: a mentor, a friend, a villain, a co-worker, a father figure, a warning sign, a sad sack, a dance partner, a guy who throws money at her, a PIZZA HOUSE. But he is not a lover, and he never should be. That would ruin Mad Men as much as poop on a brand-new office carpet.

2. Louie and Pamela (Louie)

louie pam


They’re great as friends, but in a relationship, full of kissing and hugging and all those other gross things, they’d be absolutely toxic for each other. She’d beat him up, emotionally and physically, and he’d disappoint her. Stay buddies, you stupid assholes.

3. Jaime and Brienne (Game of Thrones)



I ship incest and Brienne/Hot Pie more than Brienne/Jaime. Their antagonistic, yet adoring relationship is fine as is, which is why it’s a good thing she’s hit the road and he’s stuck in King’s Landing, running toward pie. Now THERE’S a couple that belongs together.

4. Jeff and Annie (Community)

jeff annie


No, YOU’RE THE ONE WHO WAS CANCELLED. OK, Community probably doesn’t need to come back, but if it does, the whole Jeff and Annie charade should be dropped. I’d be happy to see both of them naked (the offer’s still there, Joel and Alison — you know what I’m talking about), but not like this.

5. Sherlock and Joan (Elementary)



I’d rather watch Burgerking Cumberbatch and Martin Freeman bone than see Sherlock and Joan ruin a good thing on Elementary. Actually, no, I wouldn’t, because then the Internet would crash thanks to the GIF tidal wave that servers worldwide wouldn’t be able to keep up with. Still, no Sherlock and Joan.

6. Sonya and Marco (The Bridge)

sonya marco


Marco’s a hard-drinker who just lost his son; Sonya’s an emotionally-blocked police officer on the spectrum who shot Marco to save him from going to jail. They are not meant for each other.

7. Jake and Amy (Brooklyn Nine-Nine)

jake amy


Brooklyn Nine-Nine had a fantastic first season, not because of Jake and Amy’s on-and-off flirtatious relationship but despite it. Considering the finale, it’s obvious the show is going down the well-worn Jim and Pam path, but it doesn’t have to — I’d much rather they act like brother/sister than boinker/boinkee. Find your April and Andy elsewhere (Scully and Hitchcock?).

8. Daryl and Beth (The Walking Dead)

daryl beth


Beth/Blonde Girl is 28 years old in real life, but she looks like she’s 15 on The Walking Dead, and that’s incredibly disturbing, even for an in-recovery redneck like Daryl.

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