Super Bowl LIV, which will be played between the Kansas City Chiefs or Tennessee Titans for the AFC and Green Bay Packers or San Francisco 49ers for the NFC, isn’t until February 2, but the commercials that will air during the game are already being uploaded online. This pre-game release trend started a few years ago, as brands realized they could more eyeballs on whatever car/soda/beer/robots they’re selling if the spots comes out early; gotta make that “north of $5 million” worth it. This year’s commercials include MC Hammer donning the Hammer pants for Cheetos; Bud Light Seltzer coming for White Claw’s throne; and Sam Elliott singing “Old Town Road.”
Well, “singing” might be too charitable. Elliott croaks out Lil Nas X’s massive hit (it was the biggest song of 2019, and maybe ever) with his unmistakable Western drawl, perfect for killing Hitler and then the Bigfoot. “I got the horses in the back. Horse tack is attached. Hat is matte black. I got the boots that’s black to match,” Elliott growls to the barkeep. “Ridin’ on a horse. Ha! You can whip your Porsche. I been in the valley. You ain’t been up off that porch, now. Can nobody tell me nothing. You can’t tell me nothing.”
It’s only a teaser for the commercial, not the entire thing, so we unfortunately don’t learn Sam Elliott’s preferred Doritos flavor. Seems like a Nacho Cheese guy to me.