On Sunday, the New England Patriots face the Philadelphia Eagles in Super Bowl LII. If you’re not a fan of either team, you’re probably watching out of obligation — or because you want to see the Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom trailer — because both the Patriots and Eagles have notoriously obnoxious fanbases. One chucks batteries, the other has a swollen sense of pride after winning five Super Bowls in 17 years; also, they’re from Boston and Philly.

It’s an especially traumatic Super Bowl for New Yorkers, many of whom root for either the Jets (the Patriots’ rival… in theory) or Giants (the Eagles’ rival… in theory), so it’s no surprise that SNL took a negative view of the game. The sketch was set in 1775 when representatives from the 13 colonies met to address the revolutionary crisis. There’s the Tom Brady-loving New Englanders, led by Rachel Dratch and host Natalie Portman showing off the “best” Boston impression since Julianne Moore on 30 Rock. And speaking of 30 Rock: the Philadelphia contingent was led by Kenan Thompson, from “West Philadelphia, born and raised,” and Tina Fey, who boasted, “Like eagles, we Philadelphians are swift, we are deadly, and our eyes are a little too close together.”

It’s basically this but set in the 1770s.

Could have used more batteries, though.