Everyone Loves Jesus And Vikings, Apparently

03.12.13 16 Comments

The debut episodes of the History Channel’s two new scripted programs — Vikings and the much-publicized, 10-part miniseries The Bible — got huge ratings last week. HUGE. And while the ratings for the second episode of each show took a fairly substantial dive, they’re still big enough to confirm something I’ve long suspected: Lots of people love Jesus and vikings.

The Bible was the top program in all of television from 8-10 PM on Sunday among total viewers and 25-54, beating cable and broadcast competition. The Bible‘s lead-out, the second episode of new History series Vikings […] was the most watched cable series in the 10 PM hour and TV’s No.1 show among Men 25-54.

Are you thinking what I’m thinking? Crossover episode? Like, the vikings make port in the Holy Land, and start running amok, right? Burning down villages, looting, pillaging, the whole nine. Then Jesus shows up with his Disciples and is like “Looks like someone’s breaking the 11th Commandment” and the vikings are all “Uh… the 11th? I thought there were only 10?,” and then Jesus puts on his sunglasses, unsheaths his samurai sword, and says “Thou shall not be a dick.” Boom. Two-hour battle scene. In primetime. Maybe throw some zombies in there, too. Ratings galore.

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