Forget 'The Avengers,' We Have a New Contender for Best Film of the Summer

Why would you waste your time and money watching $100 million special effects; an all-star, A-list cast; Scarlett Johansson’s boobs in motion; and an abundance of Hulk Smash when you can see a movie with twelve dollar special effects, the old guy from “The Sopranos”; the fat guy from ‘N Sync; fake Jersey boobs in motion; and, um, sharks. Sharks that look like they’re made from papier mache.

“Jersey Shore Shark Attack” stars Tony Sirico, Joey Fatone, Paul Sorvino, William Atherton, and “Jersey Shore’s” own Vinny Guadagnino. I’ll just borrow Alcoholic’s Anonymous perfect tagline: “Leave the life vest, take the cannoli.” Here’s the trailer, which must have taken MINUTES to assemble at a cost in the thousands of pennies. Seriously, Josh’s MS Paint Job looks better than the FX in the movie.

“Jersey Shore Shark Attack” airs June 9th on the SyFy channel.